A Yearning
by mychemicalrelapse
Summary: Severus Snape can't stop thinking about Hermione, but he doesn't know that she secretly feels the same. Will their passions remain hidden or will they come bursting out? And how will they ever be able to keep their secrets safe?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**: Hey guy, I don't own any of these characters

**Author's Note** This will be a relatively short fic. Please Read & Review!

**A Yearning - Chapter 1**

_Hermione_ –

They say no one is perfect. Well, my life's ambition has always been to prove that saying wrong. To be honest, it has never been difficult for me. I suppose I can even admit to being downright pleased with myself about having been the best in my year in every subject except Defence Against the Dark Arts – which Harry has always bet me in – since starting at Hogwarts. I don't honestly mind Harry beating me. He is a natural at those spells and to sulk at his achievements would be pathetic. Besides, he is one of my best friends, Ron being the other – I love them both like brothers; and no matter what Ron says, I have never felt bad about him being better than me at something. I am and always have been proud of him.

But as I was saying, I can admit that I'm quite smart, if that doesn't sound too immodest. In fact, there is only one person that I know that doesn't seem to feel the same. That person is Professor Snape.

There are two people in this world as I see it, one type accepts that I'm fairly brilliant and appreciate my gifts while the other type hates me for it. You don't have to be the Minister for Magic to figure out why. People like Draco Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson are simply jealous that someone that is in their eyes, of a lower status, has become better than them at something. Harry and Ron have always hated people like that, and yes, I can understand why. I however, have never felt that same true anger. Yes, I dislike them for what they believe, but I know what lies behind that façade of smug superiority and ego. The Mudblood pities the Purebloods. Yes, it's interesting the way the world works, isn't it?

But Snape is different. He confuses me. His primary distaste for me, I'm sure, was simply because I was a Gryffindor – a very smart Gryffindor. Surely if I had been in Slytherin he would not have despised and discriminated me so. Somehow, I think the fact that his dead arch-enemy's son was one of my best friends probably didn't help my popularity much. But as I've said, I strive for perfection. And perfection includes love and acknowledgement from my teachers.

I tried. I did everything I could to be something he could at least regard without a stupid smirk on his face. But to no avail. My attempts, far from pleasing him, made him resent me more. For once, I was stuck. I didn't know what to do. I tried asking Harry and Ron. _Pff_. A lot of good that did. Harry just shook his head sadly but Ron stared at me disgustedly, like I had just told him that I liked to eat Flobberworms for breakfast. But how could I expect them to understand? How could I expect _anyone_ to understand?

My need for Snape's approval intensified. It was no longer a want, but a need. I was becoming obsessed – following him around, remaining behind after classes, trying to catch his eye. I took to being even more persistent in class, interrupting him and answering his questions with more vigour – if that was possible. I was eating lunch with Harry and Ron one day when I had a sudden realisation. I suppose you could call it an epiphany. It hit me so hard I gasped aloud, feeling winded. Harry stopped mid-conversation on the Chudley Cannons. 'What is it' he asked me. I stood up, 'Library. Forgot to check something for History of Magic'. Without saying goodbye I turned and ran out of the Great Hall.

I ran, not knowing where I was going. Thankfully my legs seemed to be fully functional even though my brain wasn't. I ended up in my quiet corner of the library, breathing heavily and trying not to look like I was. Sinking slowly into a chair, I gazed out of the window. In the Great Hall I had suddenly realised why I was obsessed with Professor Snape. I close my eyes and tried to block out the thought but it wouldn't disappear. Instead, it seemed to echo in my head, repeating itself over and over: _Hermione, you're in love with Professor Snape. You're in love with Snape._

It didn't matter how many times I told myself that it wasn't true because I already knew, deep down, that it was.

_Severus_ –

I had worked in this school long enough to know that no matter how many years went by, the students never changed. Every year I would be faced with a new bunch of stupid twits, having to waste my efforts on the scrawny idiots over and over again. And each new class was the same. Oh, the faces were different but the attitudes never changed. There were always the class clowns, the complete imbeciles, the quiet ones, loud ones and the smart ones. The latter were, of course, few and far between; but I pride myself in always doing my best to help those students, to give them encouragement and guidance…provided that they were in Slytherin, of course.

But the year Potter came was the marking of something different. The class itself was generally still much the same as previous classes – Longbottom practically destroying the classroom every lesson, Weasley being the loudmouthed smartarse, and Potter, of course, with his defiance and attitude. But from the first class I had with tem I saw something remarkably refreshing. The girl, Granger. She answered my questions correctly, but not only that, she had this expression…it was obvious that she was keen to learn. All the same, she was in Gryffindor and so from my perspective, there wasn't much I could do. I think I told her off rather sharply, though I can't remember what I said, only the look on her face – the shine in her eyes dulled and she lowered her hand slightly, sadly.

But for some reason this made me angry. From then on I took out this rage on her, rejecting her again and again. I suppose it's not much of an excuse but after years in the practise of showing no emotion, it was hard to change. I don't know how long it took for me to realise that the anger I felt towards her was really me being angry at myself for this cruelty. To save face, I made myself excuses: she was a Muggleborn, a Gryffindor, a friend of Potter's. Eventually, years of this allowed me to start believing in the fiction I was creating in my head. Deep down I knew I'd have to face up for this one day soon, but I was content to pretend tat what I told myself was the truth and this continued unfazed for the next six years. And then seventh year….

I've heard people say that growth spurts can happen over a matter of weeks. I suppose I'd always agreed though to be honest, I never cared about most of my students to ever notice this and I knew that if I had, it would surely have been inappropriate to do so. I am a Professor and I take my job seriously.

But when Granger came back from the summer holidays that year, she had transformed. No longer the slightly hunch, knock-kneed, frizzy haired girl that everyone had known; she looked different. She was a little taller than she had been, I think, but more obviously, she had developed a body over the summer. Although always quite slim for a girl of her age, she now had well-proportioned curves, even in school uniform it was plain to see. She had even managed to turn her hair from a pure frizz ball into a tamed mass of curls.

I suppose at first I merely took all this in without a second thought. But my first class with her proved to be most uncomfortable for me. Every time I looked at her an invisible lump formed in my throat. At first I didn't comprehend what it meant. But then I found that I couldn't bear to call her Granger anymore. Using last names was only fit for students, but there she stood, no longer a student but a gorgeous woman, and blissfully unaware of it too. Still, I couldn't call her Hermione either, as that would be suspicious above anything else. So I spent the remainder of the lesson ignoring her as much as possible. It wasn't until after class had finished and I sat behind my desk marking some essay that I realised what was happening. I stopped writing, panicking silently. I was falling for one of my students. I was falling for Hermione Granger!


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer**: Hey guy, I don't own any of these characters...wish I did

**Author's Note**: Thankyou to everyone who took the time to review me. I love you guys so much!! :) also a special thanks to Elizabeth for supporting me with this. I will try to update every few days so check back about once a week from now on. i'll let you know if there will be a delay too. Please keep Reviewing me because I'd love to know everyone's ideas. thanks

This chapter is just on Hermione, but the next one will be on Snape.

Well, so far Hermione's just realised that she's got a thing for Snape and it looks like he's feeling the same way though neither are aware yet of eachother's feelings. What will Hermione do now?

**A Yearning - Chapter 2**

_Hermione_ –

What in Merlin's name was I going to do? I was horrified at myself for the feelings I was having, but now that I'd accepted my situation, the emotions which had been tied up inside me seemed to want to just spill out everywhere.

There was, of course, no use denying the situation. I had heard enough similar stories over the years to realize that pretending the problem didn't exist wouldn't get rid of it. Oh no, the tragic stories I'd heard from the girl's sobbing in the bathroom wasn't something I wanted to encounter first hand in a hurry. Especially over a teacher. Even more especially over Snape!

After my initial shock I had stayed in the library for as long as I could – it was a refuge to me, not to mention somewhere I could go to get away from anyone I knew, anyone who might ask questions. What questions someone would possibly ask, I didn't know, but it was, after all, like Ron said: what self-respecting student hangs out in the library unless they have to? It was something I could use to my advantage. But for the moment, I couldn't stay for long because the first class of the day started soon: History of Magic.

I wasn't sure where Ron and Harry were so I started walking to class without them. Walking down a corridor I saw Lavender Brown look at me. Was it just me, or did she look a little odd? I smiled anyway, and walked on, but not before noticing that she had turned to whisper in Parvati's ear. I felt the smile slide right off my face.

Up ahead I saw Neville. Thinking I could talk to _him_, I started towards him, relieved. But just as I came near him he gave me a frightened look and hurried away.

What was wrong with everyone? I looked around me – everyone was standing around with their friends, laughing and chatting and looking normal. Was it really just me? Was I allowing myself to get paranoid over this so easily?

I kept walking, avoiding everyone's gaze. I could feel everyone staring at me. The heat crept up to my cheeks. This was, without doubt, the most humiliating experience of my life. Somehow, everyone must have found out about my secret obsession! I knew I would never live this down.

But somehow, I made it all the way to History of Magic. Without waiting for Harry and Ron I rushed into the room and into my usual seat. Sitting down, I let out a sigh of relief that I didn't even know I'd been holding.

While waiting for Professor Binns, I told myself to be rational. How could everyone possibly know that I was in love with Professor Snape? I certainly hadn't told anyone. I cast my mind back over the previous week. I couldn't remember acting in a way that would make it obvious to everyone that I liked him. Any way I looked at it, it didn't make sense that anyone could know.

I thought about what had just happened in the corridor to class. Lavender had whispered something to Parvati. And Neville had looked pretty scared when he saw me. But then again, Lavender and Parvati were always gossiping about something, and Neville usually looked frightened anyway, especially before Potions class.

Oh no! Potions class! I suddenly remembered that I had a double with the Slytherins that very afternoon! The panic that had momentarily vanished flared right up again. What was I going to do? Surely I would do something incredibly stupid in front of Professor Snape!

But before my imagination could begin to run away with itself, my internal instincts kicked in. The rational part of me told me not to worry. That I had never done anything stupid in Potions all my life, that today wouldn't be any different…usually this kind of thing worked well, but it didn't seem to be working today.

And would you believe it? One minute I was fretting over not making an idiot of myself, the next I was thinking about Snape. No, _Severus_. Suddenly I wasn't the least bit uncomfortable saying his name.

Professor Binns had drifted into the classroom and begun his daily drone over something to do with the 1476 Failed Treaty for the Protective Rights of Hags and Werewolves…or something like that. For the first time, I wasn't paying any attention. My mind was all about Severus.

I thought about him. The first thing you noticed about him was his voice. Deep and cold, it was a voice that told you that he wasn't a man to be messed with. It said: this is a man of power, of control, and he has dark secrets. Yes, his voice was something that could give you shivers if you weren't careful. But, I remembered suddenly, he didn't sound very cold around the Slytherins. I supposed that he reserved his kindness and concern to only a special few…And he was tall, yes, but not attractive in the classical. His face was nice, but his hair was rather greasy and his skin pallid. _Nothing a shower and a tan couldn't fix, though,_ said some little voice in my head. An image of him in the shower popped up in my mind, water dripped off of his skin in rivulets…like a camera panning down in some Muggle movie my eyes travelled from his broad shoulders, water dripping down, following the curves of his chest and stomach; dripping down, down, down to his huge, throbbing–

'Hermione? Hermione! Herm, wake up!' I was pulled out of my thoughts like I'd been plunged under water. It took me a few moments to realise where I was. Class had finished, it seemed, and Ron was shaking me. I had fallen asleep.

'You fell asleep' said Ron simply. He stood there next to Harry, both grinning ear to ear like a couple of idiots.

Without saying anything, I gathered up my stuff, blushing furiously. Ron was laughing and Harry trying hard not to. Apparently the idea that I had fallen asleep was very entertaining to them both. I looked at Harry, ready to wipe the smirks off their faces with some icy comment when I had a sudden heart-stopping thought. Harry noticed, and frowned. 'What?'

I looked at him, then Ron. 'Did– did I say anything…you know, when I fell asleep? Did I say anything in my sleep?' The very idea that I had said something embarrassing about Severus Snape in my dreams was enough to make me want to sink into the ground.

Harry shook his head, but he continued to give me a strange look. 'No, Hermione. You didn't say anything. Look, are you alright? I mean, you've never fallen asleep in class before!'

I avoided his gaze. 'I've just been tired. I…had an Arithmancy essay due and wasn't sure if I had put in enough detail. Honestly, I'm alright.' I tried to smile reassuringly, but I've been told I'm a hopeless actress. Harry obviously wasn't buying it either. 'Hermione, please, you've been acting strange all day.'

'Stranger than usual you mean' quipped Ron, laughing as we walked out of the room.

I knew I couldn't give Harry an honest answer so I rounded on Ron instead. 'I wasn't aware that you had a problem with my strangeness Ron, especially when it worked to your advantage.'

Ron looked as perplexed as ever. 'Whadda you mean?'

I smiled at him. 'You do realise that while I was asleep I wasn't taking any notes, which means that unless some miracle has occurred and you paid attention to Professor Binns and wrote your _own_ notes; you won't have any idea what he was just talking about.'

Ron and Harry had both stopped walking, frozen with horror at this realisation. I kept walking, 'And it'll probably be in the exam too. See you both at lunch!' I made my way to Ancient Runes class.

_It ends now, Hermione_, said my inner voice, as I walked. _This can't keep happening! You've got some silly little crush on a teacher and it won't get you anywhere good!_ _You will go to double Potions later and act like nothing has changed. Get over this now!_ There was a smile on my face but inside, I was frowning.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot

**Author's Note**: Thanks again to my reviewers. You guys are awesome! Also, sorry that this chapter is a little shorter than the other two. I'll try to make the next one longer for you guys :) Keep checking back for updates cuz ill probably post the next chapter within a few days! thanks

Recap: Hermione's decided to play it cool. Will Snape do the same? Lets find out...

**A Yearning - Chapter 3**

_Severus –_

I was sitting in my quiet office marking third year essays. Well…I was trying to. Needless for me to say, marking essays isn't something I particularly enjoy, but such are the woes of a teacher. I was trying to finish them quickly so I could go outside for a stroll in the sunshine, a habit that would shock most of the students and some of the teachers in this place. But despite rumours, I do not enjoy sitting hunched up in the dungeons _all_ day.

Unfortunately it was very difficult for me to concentrate on the essays because I was getting very distracted. Even more frustrating was that the source of my distraction was, unusually, my own imagination.

No matter how many times I tried to read the pathetic manuscripts in front of me, all I saw was Hermione Granger in my head. I scowled at the image and shook my head. _Concentrate Severus!_ I told myself. Here I was, a Professor of Potions, thinking about one of my _students_!

The very idea was sickening, even for me. A teacher wanting a student? It was perverted. But all the same, a little voice at the back of my head kept reminding me that Hermione was no longer a little girl, but a fully-fledged witch. She was also of age now, so it wouldn't exactly be illegal….

I flung down my quill in disgust, as though it was someone else who was suggesting this idea. As though it wasn't my own fault at all that I was thinking these things.

But even as I sighed and looked out of my window, I kept seeing her in my head. If that wasn't bad enough, my imagination was starting to create little scenarios where she would come to me in my office, whispering softly in my ear, begging me to have her. I'd peel off her clothes, savouring the feel of her soft skin; slowly kissing her, being turned on by her moans. Moving down her neck, I'd plant tantalizing kisses on her beautiful pink nipples and stroke her lovely breasts until she begged me to–

I stood up violently, knocking over the ink pot, sending black ink flying over the floor.

'NO!' I bellowed, to no one in particular. Cursing silently at myself for being so stupid, I muttered the spell and the ink flew back into the bottle. I stood, waiting. I thought for certain that someone had heard me, or if not, they must have certainly heard my heart, it was thumping loud enough.

No one came. _Thank Merlin my office is in the dungeon_, I thought. I sat down, trying to calm myself, but my body didn't seem to want to. If anything, my heart only seemed to beat faster. I realised I was shaking.

I breathed deeply and closed my eyes. Then I opened them straight away. Closing my eyes was only going to get me into even more trouble with my imagination! I looked away, trying to clear my head. Still, all I could see was Hermione.

This wasn't fair, I told myself. It wasn't.

I was having sexual fantasies about a woman who was totally out of my reach. Even, _if_ (and this was a very big "if") she did have feelings for me, she was a student.

_And of course she doesn't have feelings for you,_ smirked a nasty voice in my head. _How could she? You've despised her since you met her, even made fun of her. Now you turn around and want her to moan in your ear? Get real._

I slammed my fists on the desk in anger. It was starting to get difficult for me to conceal my emotions here, something I was usually exceptionally good at doing. I had the feeling that I was losing control of myself and it was scaring me.

It was all her fault, I thought childishly. _Yes, that's right Severus. Put the blame on someone else_, the voice was whispering again.

I gritted my teeth. Standing up, I walked out in front of my desk and began pacing. I knew that there was no way that I could ever get any work done if I didn't mull this over.

_Okay_, I thought, _so I knew what was going on here. But what could I do about it? _I paced faster. Certainly, I couldn't tell any of my colleagues. I strongly doubted that even Dumbledore would feel sympathetic towards me. _So that meant I couldn't even ask for help…not that I _needed_ help, of course…_

I stopped pacing, suddenly furious again. This was ridiculous! _I am Severus Snape! I don't need help from anyone because there isn't even a problem! This is just some silly phase I'm going through and I'll get over it. Hermione Granger? Bah! She might be intelligent, witty, have a gorgeous figure and…_

I was starting to lose myself again. I very nearly slapped myself across the face. _Granger is a student_, I thought firmly. _Just a student. Having these thoughts won't get you anywhere, Severus. So just stop thinking about her and everything will work itself out._

I nodded to myself and went back to my desk. Sitting down again, I sighed as I looked at the pile of essay still waiting to be marked. Getting back up again, more calmly this time, I walked across the office and to the door.

_To hell with the essays_, I thought. I need some fresh air and lunch. _And you're going to need it to, considering you'll be seeing Hermione straight afterwards_, sneered the little voice.

I slammed the dungeon door behind me in anger, hearing the pile of marked essay topple over in the office. _Fuck you, too_, I thought irritably, and stormed away.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot

**Author's Note**: To all my reviews i love you all so much! Hugs and kisses to you guys :) Im so so so sorry that i've kept you all waiting for this chapter but i've been busy. but i've finally updated. This chappie is a _little_ longer than the last and hopefully i will find time to post another chapter soon *fingers crossed*. Please keep reviewing me and tell me if its terrible so i can improve it!

Recap: Hermy and Sev aren't too happy about discovering that they like eachother. What will happen now that its time for Potions class?

**A Yearning - Chapter 4**

_Hermione –_

The day flew by so quickly that I actually drew my breath sharply when I found myself at the door to Potions that afternoon. After having told myself off this morning in History of Magic class, I had been confidently assuming that I would be able to cope in Severus Snape's presence. Suddenly I wasn't so sure.

Without having the bravery to walk into the classroom, I stood outside with my head bent down towards my bag, pretending to be searching for something when I was really panicking over my situation. Could I really just walk into the classroom and not reveal myself to everyone? Could I really stay calm with Snape staring at me with those dark, deep eyes? I didn't know, but I was ready to gamble a million Galleons to say that I couldn't.

Also knowing I couldn't stay out here for very much longer because I would then run straight into Snape himself, as well as probably lose house points, I stood there like an idiot outside the classroom, frantically bopping up and down on the spot, trying to get my brain to work.

Time was beginning to feel like it was speeding up on me and I still I couldn't decide whether I should go in or just walk away. It was like those Muggle cartoons, with the angel on one side and the devil on the other, each telling me what I should do, and stupidly enough I stood there listening anxiously. _Go in Hermione_, said one side of my conscious, _you can perv on Snape if you want to and no one will know!_ Then the other side stepped in: _Don't be stupid Hermione! If you go in you'll just make a fool of yourself in front of Snape, and Harry and Ron will never forgive you!_

I gave an exasperated sigh at this, even though I knew these were all my own thoughts. _Harry and Ron would never stop being friends with me because I had a crush on Snape – and it's _just_ a crush_, I told myself firmly. And on that note I picked up my bag, determined to walk through that dreaded door to Potions.

And I was so close too. But I had my hand on the door when I suddenly remembered the piercing gaze of Snape's eyes and his deep voice, and I thought of my dream from History of Magic with him in the shower, horny as hell and beads of water clinging to every curve of his muscles. The very thought was intoxicating, and suddenly I could hardly breathe.

_You see?_ Said one side of my conscious. I could almost see it smirking. _You can't just walk through that door and expect everything to be normal!_ Then the other side of my brain perked up and for once, agreed. _Hermione, just_ _go back upstairs and sleep on this. You'll see this all clearer tomorrow and then you'll know how to handle it._

That was it. I turned around at once and was a millisecond away from rushing off to take a hot bath when I saw him – Snape. Coming right towards me!

I had no excuses and my resolve vanished as quickly as it had come. I turned around again and walked straight through the door to Potions before I had even realised what I had just done. But when my brain caught up with my legs, to my horror, I found I couldn't stop them. They marched me straight to my usual table at the back of the room where Ron and Harry were already waiting.

I couldn't seem turn around. I couldn't stop myself. Once I had walked through that door it was impossible to leave. I sat down miserably, knowing that there was no way I could leave this room until class was finished. I would have to stick it out. I felt as though I had signed my own death warrant.

'Jeez, you took long enough to get here, Hermione. Where were you?' Ron had turned around to look at me. If Harry had looked worried this morning, it was all the more startling to see Ron looking worried now too.

'I was umm...I was at the…err'. My brain was still in shock and refusing to provide my mouth with answers. Fortunately, before Ron had time to question me further, the Potions door slammed shut and nearly everyone jumped. Unfortunately, the door slamming meant that Snape had entered the room and, feeling myself blush, I lowered my head down to the Potions book in front of me. By this stage, I was trusting my emotions less and less, and remained determined not to look at him.

'That's enough, class. That's enough.' His lazy voice echoed around the dungeon, and although all hubbub had vanished the second that door had closed, the room suddenly seemed even quieter to me. I sat, for the first time ever, low in my seat, wishing desperately that his voice wasn't turning my insides over.

Snape was still speaking: 'Today you will be continuing the Wolfsbane Potion that you begun last week. If brewed correctly, it should have thinned out considerably and if you are not the bunch of complete imbeciles that you continually assure me you are, by the end of today, it should be thinner still, as well as lighter in colour. The instructions are on the board.'

I still had my head down all this time, but once he had finished talking, I noticed people were starting to move around and so, feeling safer, I lifted my head. The quicker I finished this potion, I thought, the quicker I could get out of here.

The first thing I did was carefully avoid looking towards the front where I knew Snape was standing, and began to get my cauldron ready. Harry, it seemed, had already started moving to the front to collect our potions; and Ron was organising his ingredients. Everything was completely normal around me, yet I couldn't even look at the front of the room. With all the effort I had, I forced my head up.

The first thing I did was look at Snape. Naturally. I could have kicked myself except that, as though this was a response to my earlier actions, I couldn't seem to move. Why? Because Severus Snape was looking directly at me.

Well, at least he looked at me for about a tenth of a second before moving towards Crabbe to see his potion. My breath momentarily caught in my throat and I dropped my gaze immediately, hurrying to follow the instructions on the board.

Keeping my eyes on my cauldron and my brain focused on the task at hand, I managed to get through the rest of that lesson. It passed by just as blurrily as that whole day had, and I found myself with ten minutes to go until the end of class and my potion nearly finished. I was completing the last step written on the board: _lower the heat on your cauldron and stir clockwise until the potion turns pale blue. _Needless to say, it wasn't a difficult step and I smiled, thinking that the lesson hadn't been any worse than usual. I hadn't humiliated myself in front of Snape and my secret passion was still, well…a secret. The only thing that was strange was having caught Snape staring at me. The expression on his face had been strange…almost hungry. But I shook my head impatiently. This was just my own deluded thoughts, I told myself, and he hadn't looked at me in any way that was different from usual…or had he?

I was just beginning to think this over again when I felt a presence behind me. Thinking it was just Ron coming to peer at my potion, I looked up, annoyed. To my complete horror I found it was not Ron there, but Snape himself.

It felt like there were giant butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. My heart was racing. Unable to avoid him, I found myself saying much more calmly than I felt 'Yes Professor?'

He looked at me and for another brief moment, our eyes met again. His gaze was so intense and deep that I thought I could get lost in him and never find my way out. I felt the passion rise within me like it had in History of Magic, and was scared that for a moment, I might lose control. I became aware of how close he was standing. We were only a foot apart. He was close enough to touch me, and suddenly, I felt this overwhelming want for him. I wanted him to touch me, hold me close, kiss me. Surely, he could tell what I was thinking? Couldn't he hear my heart pounding? I could hardly breathe. But then he blinked and the moment was over.

'Let's see your potion', he said softly. His voice was making my legs melt but I found myself moving slowly aside to let him see my potion. He moved slowly too, as he bent over the cauldron. It felt like we were caught in slow-motion.

He paused and then still, slowly, he looked up again at me. 'Is there anything wrong with your eyes?' he asked softly.

I stood there, frozen. Had I heard him right? 'Sorry, Professor?' I replied.

'I said, is there anything wrong with your eyes. Because there must either be something wrong with them, or with you. Read the last line of instructions.'

I looked at the board blankly and read the last line. It took me a few seconds to realise that I had done it wrong. I had stirred counter-clockwise, not clockwise. I looked down at my potion. It was not pale blue, but rather a pale grey. I had been thinking about Snape and hadn't been concentrating on my work. I had made a mistake in Potions for the first time.

The shock of this alone was enough to send me to tears, but Snape was speaking again. Even through my numbness, his voice was giving me tingles and I couldn't help but listen. 'Your potion is worthless! This is real life, Miss Granger, and you cannot make mistakes like this in the outside world! Imagine giving a werewolf this potion – it would most likely prove fatal.'

I was still numb from the shock of making such a mistake and couldn't have made a reply, even if I had one ready. He must have taken it as an insult because he had started speaking softly, but now, suddenly he was yelling at me, 'Mistakes like this cannot be made! And it seems to me that it is not only this potion that is a mistake, but you, yourself! _You_ are a mistake! Your potion is worthless because you are worthless! You will never, _ever_ be a good potioneer! You are finished in this class! FINISHED!' He screamed this at last, and the whole room was silent.

I didn't know what to do or what to say. I looked up at him and his whole face was as white as a sheet. I opened my mouth but nothing would come out. Tears prickled my eyes and suddenly my feelings overcame me and I started to sob, not just quietly, but in earnest.

Without picking up any of my things, and with everyone staring at me in silent shock, I ran out of the room with my hands over my face. The last thing I thought before I slammed the door behind me was that I could have sworn I saw Snape's face crumple when I started to cry, but as I ran to the Gryffindor tower I convinced myself that the tears had just blurred my vision.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot

**Author's Note**: Wow! This update is much quicker than i thought it would be but im really excited about this story. Thanks for the reviews guys! It makes this writing all worthwhile. A special shoutout to Jasmine-leigh for your review: it made me laugh! Hugs and kisses to you all you guys :) Not sure when the next chappie will be up, but probably not as quick as this post has been. Please Read and Review, even if you hate it. Tell me what you think!

Also, warning: this chapter contains some course language. but hey, its rated M for a reason.

Recap: Poor Hermione! Snape's lost his temper at her - but why? After all, there are two sides to every story...

**A Yearning - Chapter 5**

_Snape – _

I was furious. Absolutely fucking furious.

I was standing outside on the battlements of the Astronomy Tower and it was no longer a sunny morning and I wasn't marking essays. No. It was now close to midnight and I was looking up, staring at the tiny pinpricks of starlight in the deep blue, velvety evening sky. There wasn't a cloud in sight and the half moon was clear and bright, shining down with pure light. Once again, I think people would generally be shocked to know that I enjoy these poetics; but since when have I ever cared what people think?

But it should have been beautiful, and I should have felt relaxed, but I was in no mood to enjoy scenery.

Because I was furious. At myself.

I shook my head._ What have I done? _I thought. I had acted like a complete and utter prick to Hermione and now how could I even expect her to look at me again?

And she did look at me, I thought. She had looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes during class today and I had responded by screaming at her like a banshee. _Well done, Severus_.

I sighed angrily and turned away from the moon and into the shadows. I had to re-think this over. It was important that I didn't mistake anything she did as a display of emotions, when it could be completely coincidental and just my own deluded fantasy playing up.

And by now I had given up all pretence on Hermione. How could I possibly pretend that I didn't want her now, after what I had done today? There was no use keeping up the act if I, myself didn't believe it.

I leaned against a cold stone wall amongst the shadow, where no one would see me if they decided to wander up here.

Had she really looked at me? I could have sworn I had seen something in her face, something that mirrored my own need to touch her, to taste her. Oh, what I would give to explore every inch of her body, feel her soft skin and whisper dark secrets in her ear…

I sighed again, but this time with remorse and longing.

But had she really looked at me that way? I thought she had, but now, suddenly, I was filled with doubt. _Go back_, the voice in my head whispered. _Go back to the beginning of class. What had happened?_

And so I pressed my back against the wall and closed my eyes wearily, thinking back to the beginning of double Potions earlier that day...

I had been running late. Some stupid first year had managed to cover the entire Slytherin common-room with Dungbombs, and who had to sort it out? Who had to listen to Filch whining? Who had to endure McGonagall and Sprout smirking behind their hands the whole time? Me, of course. Severus Snape to the rescue.

So yes, I had been running late. And so I was already in a bad mood to start with. The last thing I expected was to see Hermione standing outside the classroom door alone, when everyone else had already gone inside. Even from a distance I could see that there was something wrong. She was looking at the door and then turning away, as though she couldn't decide whether she wanted to go inside or not. She also looked on the verge of tears.

As much as I wanted to rush up and hold her, calm her down, I knew very well that I couldn't. And besides, I was still denying my urges towards her. So I did the most decent thing I could think of: I slowed down my steps. Surely she would notice me and walk inside before I reached her.

And it seemed to do the trick, because as soon as she saw me she turned and walked straight through the door; although I noticed that her face had gone white.

I should have realised that this was strange behaviour for Hermione. She was never one to frown at a teacher, even at me. There was obviously something very very wrong, but I was still caught up on my thoughts of touching her. I had already told myself off once for that today and I was in no mood for my imagination to continue in this vein for the double. Angrily, I strode into Potions and slammed the door behind me, although I managed to control my voice.

I sounded much calmer than I felt as I set the class instructions. For some reason, my own voice seemed to calm me of the situation. I was in control of this environment, I thought, and some student of mine was not going to get the better of my emotions! I found myself staring right at Hermione, even as the class started to move around and collect their ingredients. But she wasn't looking at me. She was staring fixedly at the book in front of her, still looking pale.

Even after I had set the class their task, she hadn't moved. This was extremely odd, because she was usually the first one off her chair, ever ready to begin work. And she still wasn't even looking up. No one else seemed to notice, not even Potter or Weasley. I was considering asking her if she was unwell, and wondering if this would seem too suspicious; when she suddenly looked up at me.

I didn't have time to react. I had been lost in thought, and as she looked at me our eyes met. My brain went straight to panic mode. I looked away instantly, but there had still been a single moment where her eyes looked into mine. I didn't know what I was seeing in those bright eyes. She was looking at me with that tensed, beautiful face of hers, with such intensity and fire written all over her. I felt an unspeakable passion rise up inside me. Suddenly, I knew that I needed to have her right then. In that moment I wanted her more than anything I had ever wanted. There was nothing else but her, and she had to be mine.

But I couldn't have her. I knew that, and there was nothing I could say or do to her in the classroom. So I walked away towards Crabbe, pretending to be checking up on his potion when I was really trying to recover from this absolute shock to my system.

As I bent over Crabbe's cauldron there was only one thought in my head: _Fuck. If I can't even control myself when I look at her, how can I possibly get near her?_ This was one question I couldn't bear to answer, so as I straightened up and walked over to Draco, I resolved that the best thing to do was to avoid Hermione at all costs for the rest of the lesson.

Unfortunately, about half way through the double I realised that I would have to confront Hermione because I needed to check her potion.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck. _The words kept repeating over and over in my head as I kept checking the time, knowing that eventually I would have to go over to her. And it wasn't that I didn't want to go near her, it was that I didn't think I could totally control myself if I did.

But the time kept on ticking and it was ten minutes to go before the lesson ended. I knew it was now or never, so as I smirked at Potter's potion, which was still a mid-blue colour; I turned towards Hermione. She was stirring her potion and smiling to herself. Merlin, she looked so sexy standing there, her hips moving gently to the rhythm of her mixing. I don't even think she realised what she was doing. I watched her for a few moments, silently enjoying the scene in front of me. But, as I meant to move towards her I felt a sudden hardness around my groin. Panicking, I realised I was starting to go stiff in the classroom! But there was nothing I could do without giving myself away, and thankfully my cloak could block any unusual shapes emerging from my body. Well, that's what I told myself, anyway.

I moved towards her like I was in a dream, feeling myself get harder with every step. Somehow, my voice once again managed to stay calm, even as I wanted to ravage her. As I stood in front of her, and with her so close to me, my breathing started to race and I became even more painfully aware of my erection. What was I doing? Suddenly I realised I couldn't hold in these emotions for very much longer. I met her eyes again and, as before, I saw this look of intense longing in them. I restrained myself, somehow, and turned to look at her potion.

I found that I couldn't move fast. Time had momentarily seemed to stop and I was caught in it with her.

But as I bent over her cauldron, the restrain I had been fighting desperately to keep inside suddenly snapped. As I looked at her potion I noticed that she had done the last step of the instructions incorrectly: she had mixed the potion the wrong way. Of course, Hermione was such a natural at potions that it hadn't made much of a difference to the potion's properties. Only a slight change in colour was apparent, but I was suddenly furious at her for it.

It was exactly as it was when I had lost control in my office earlier in the day. I suddenly couldn't stand it all. I couldn't stand how she was making me feel, and how I knew that there was absolutely nothing I could do about it, or to make her feel the same way. And so I snapped. I raised my head and started to scream at her, saying that she was worthless, that she would never amount to anything…

I opened my eyes again. The Astronomy Tower was as still and silent as before. I moved away from the wall and continued to think.

The rest of the day had gone by in a blur. I couldn't even remember how the lesson had ended. All I could see was how Hermione's eyes had welled up with tears and how she had rushed out of the room.

I covered my face with my hands. Thinking back to the lesson had only made me realise that I must have deeply hurt her. She _had_ looked at me with a passion. Now I was sure of it. It wasn't possible that I was merely mistaking my feelings for hers.

And what could I do now? But I already knew there was only one answer. Tomorrow I would have to find her, and apologize.

Suddenly I had a purpose. I looked back up at the moon and smiled to myself.


	6. Chapter 6

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot which appears to be picking up, finally!

**Author's Note**: Double chapter update! Woot! I thought about doing Hermione and Sev's POV's seperatley but it just seemed to flow better as one big chapter. Hope you guys like it. Please Read and Review!

Recap: Snape's decided to apologize to Hermione. Will he tell her how he really feels? And how will she deal with this?

**A Yearning - Chapter 6**

_Hermione – _

It was a Saturday, and I was sitting in the Great Hall with Harry and Ron, eating breakfast. Well, they were eating and I had my face in my hand, staring at the jug of pumpkin juice in front of me. I just wasn't hungry after yesterday's Potion ordeal.

I had continued to cry for a while after Potions, until Harry and Ron had found me and tried their best to console me and I received similar sympathy from the rest of the Gryffindors. But their jokes and comments about Snape didn't seem to help because I knew I wasn't mad at him, I was really mad at myself for stuffing up.

I wasn't sure when I first realised it, but I knew that the things that Snape had said about me weren't true and I knew that he didn't really think they were either. But unlike Snape, _I_ also knew that the reason I had made the mistake in the first place was _because_ of him, and I wasn't so worried about my feelings for him, as much as that if I didn't do something about this soon then it would just keep happening.

The main problem was, of course, that I couldn't talk to anyone about this. I couldn't tell Harry or Ron, and most certainly couldn't tell Snape himself, or could I?

I shook this thought out of my head just as Ron stood up from the table and stretched dramatically. 'Well, Hermione. Me and Harry are gonna go practise flying for a while. You wanna come?'

My mouth fell open in shock. 'Ron, you've got _two_ papers due! You both should be studying, not flying! Besides, it'll probably rain soon.' I added miserably, looking up at the ceiling.

Ron shook his head mockingly, 'You worry too much Hermione. We'll be fine. We'll catch up with them later, right?' He looked slightly worried at Harry, who grinned in reply and stood up.

But something must have shown on my face, and Harry caught it. 'Look, are you still upset about Snape? Hermione, you're ten times more brilliant at Potions then he'll ever be.' He gave me a smile of concern. Ron heard and chimed in, 'Yeah, he's a prick anyways. But you should come out to the grounds with us. All that book dust can't be good for you.'

I laughed but shook my head again. 'Might just have some breakfast and then I'll see.' I watched them walk off, and then sighed deeply. Wouldn't they ever learn that they should never leave their homework to the last minute?

I started to smile though. Perhaps things would go back to normal on their own. Perhaps this crush on Snape would just disappear. Suddenly, I was hungry again. I grabbed a piece of buttered toast and began to eat.

*~*

It was mid-morning by the time I had finished breakfast, but there was no sun shining today. Like I had predicted, rain clouds were filling the sky and as I started to climb the stairs I wondered silently how Ron and Harry could stand flying when it was so cold. Lost in these thoughts, I didn't see Ginny until it was too late. I bumped straight into her, knocking her to the floor.

'Ginny! Sorry, I wasn't really looking wh-' I began, pulling her up with my arm, but Ginny cut me off.

'Hermione! Thank God I found you! I've been looking upstairs for you everywhere! I just saw Snape and I tried to avoid him like usual, but he came up to me and told me to tell _you_ that he wanted to see you in his office!' She said it all in one breath, looking flustered and annoyed.

I felt equally as flustered. I couldn't speak, only nod.

'Do you want me to go with you? Snape's such a slime ball.' Ginny was looking worried.

I appreciated the concern, but the insult instantly spurred my senses. 'No, Ginny! Umm…I mean it's okay. I'd rather go alone. Really, it's _fine_.' I emphasised when Ginny's expression intensified.

'Okay, Hermione. Well, I'm going to head out to the grounds. I promised Hagrid I'd help him with Fang. Apparently he's eaten a rock cake and it's made him go a bit funny. See you later.' Ginny gave a forced smile and walked straight past me without a backward glance.

I shook my head, frowning and annoyed. Ginny was always one to switch moods in an instant. I suppose she took my refusal as some sort of insult, I thought, sighing as I began to walk back down the stairs towards the dungeons.

But there were more important things to think about now. Snape wanted to see me? Why? Was it because of what happened in Potions? Was he still angry?

And there were other important questions. I walked down the dungeon corridor, still deep in thought. How would I react being alone with Snape in the room?

My heart started to race as I approached his office.

I knocked on the door and waited. 'Enter' came the reply. I opened the door.

Snape was sitting at his desk scribbling something on a piece of parchment. He looked up and smiled at me when I walked in.

Wait. What?

Snape smiling?! Impossible!

Yet he was.

Never in the seven years I'd spent at Hogwarts had I ever seen Snape smile. Like fairy godmothers and wishes, this was one of those things that you just assumed impossible. It was something I in particular learnt very quickly: even magic has limitations.

But of all the magic I'd seen and read about, I had never seen anything as miraculously magical as when he smiled. It changed and rearranged his face. Suddenly he wasn't a sullen, sarcastic man who despised everyone; but someone else – someone younger and happier. He looked like the kind of teacher that girls would get a crush on. If only the other girls in Hogwarts could have seen it.

It was a brief smile, but it was beautiful.

But all the same I was suddenly very nervous. I closed the door and remained standing halfway between it and his desk, as I waited for him to finish whatever it was he was writing.

'Just one minute, Miss Granger' he said, as he continued to scribble. I didn't reply.

Some moments later Snape put down his quill and rolled up the parchment. He stood up and gestured to the chair opposite his desk, which was empty. 'Take a seat, please.'

My anxiety increased. The situation was altogether very odd. Snape had told me to see him when he had never done so before. Now here, he was treating me suspiciously decent and was smiling at me. Was this too good to be true? What was going on?

Silently, I moved across the room, taking care not to look at him. I sat down and then he did the same. I felt my heart begin to flutter again, whether out of excitement or fear I didn't know.

I looked up properly for the first time and found he was staring at me and smiling. Staring and smiling. _Again_. My fluttering heart started beating double-time. I didn't know what to do. Should I smile back? Or was this some cruel joke?

Luckily I didn't have to do anything. He stopped smiling and sighed. His expression was hard to place. He almost looked worried. Smiling and looking worried.

Now I was curious. What else was new about Severus Snape? I waited for him to speak.

He looked down at his hands which were resting on the desk. 'Miss Granger,' he began, 'I wanted to talk to you about what happened yesterday in Potions. More specifically, I wanted to apologise for what I said.' I looked up at him, but he was still looking at his hands.

I opened my mouth to speak but was momentarily lost for words. He looked up at me and found me staring.

He didn't look back down but continued to look at me, his black eyes gazing into mine. Finally his lips parted and he whispered, 'I'm very sorry, Hermione.'

The silence stretched around us and seemed to last forever. We continued to gaze at each other and again, I felt myself inwardly falling into him. I realised I was leaning forward, and he was too. We were so close, leaning across the desk and I saw his lips part…but then I suddenly remembered where I was and who I was with, and the moment popped like a balloon.

I stood up in a rush, dazed. I felt like the room had been spinning around me. Snape blinked and leaned back slowly, frowning slightly. I was shaking. Something had just happened between me and Severus Snape, and I wasn't sure that I wanted to know what it was. I pushed back the chair and turned to go, but he stood up.

I looked at him fleetingly, wondering if he was going to try to stop me from leaving. I reached for my wand surreptitiously, but my brain was already telling me that there would be no point. He was a far better wizard, far more experienced. He had been a Death Eater. Perhaps he had even done this before to other women –

'Hermione, please. Can we just talk?' He was pleading with me. He hadn't reached for his wand. Instead, he stayed standing behind his desk, looking at me with an intense longing written on his face, and there was also….sadness?

I did not lower my wand. I did not sit back down. I had seen enough in his expression to know that this man had wanted more than just to apologize to me. Shock, more than any other emotion, had hit me now like a punch in the stomach. What did this mean?

Was this was a trick, a ruse to try to disarm me without causing too much chaos and noise that others might hear? It had to be. I had wanted him, but not like this.

I backed away from the desk, my wand still on him. He did not attempt to stop me. I reached the door, felt the handle dig into my lower back. He had still done nothing, just continued to look at me with that expression, that sad desperateness.

I reached my left hand behind me and gripped the handle. Suddenly my heart started thumping. What if he had locked it? What if he had trapped me in here? Panic threatened to overwhelm me but I said a silent prayer as I turned the knob. It was unlocked!

I froze for a split second and then slowly walked back forward, allowing the door to open inwards. I walked backwards again and stood in the doorway. He was still looking at me, silently. He was waiting for me to say something.

As much as I was now scared of him, I still wanted to say something. I realised that I hadn't said a single word to him yet. And I could see it in his eyes now, even from the doorway. He was waiting to hear something, anything that might tell him how I felt.

I felt torn. I wanted to run over and hug him, but at the same time I wanted to run as far away from him as I could. I hesitated, opening my mouth as if expecting the words to form on their own. What could I possibly say? At that moment I didn't even know what I wanted.

He was still waiting. He looked sadder than ever. Suddenly I couldn't stand it, couldn't stand the anxiety, the confusion of it all. My thoughts started racing faster than I could keep up: me crying in Potions - Harry looking worried - Neville with a terrified expression as he turned and ran away - Ginny looking angry - Ron laughing - falling asleep in History of Magic - Snape yelling...my vision blurred and I felt the world tilting away. I tried to cry out but my mouth wasn't working. The last thing I could see was Snape's face, the way it had crumpled when I had started to sob. I heard my name echo around me, and then the world went black.

_Severus – _

I had planned it all. I knew that there could be no mistakes this time. Hadn't I already proven that I was rapidly losing control of my own emotions?

It was a Saturday and I used this to my advantage. She wouldn't have any classes, and if I knew her as well as I thought I did, she wouldn't have any homework either.

Unfortunately, I couldn't just walk right up to her. So as I was walking back from the kitchens with my breakfast I spotted one of the Weasleys, the girl, Ginny. I called her over and gave her the message telling Hermione to meet me in my office. Then I hurried back down to my quarters so I could eat. Breakfast is, of course, the most important meal of the day.

I was writing a letter to my mother when I heard the knock on my office door. I cursed silently, knowing it was Hermione. I wasn't prepared. But I couldn't leave her standing out there. 'Enter' I called out, in my usual sonorous voice.

Determined to not look up, I kept writing as I heard the handle turn and her soft footsteps as she walked in, the door closing quietly behind her.

Almost against my will, I jerked my head up and saw Hermione standing there.

Her presence nearly took my breath away. She looked beautiful; it was hard to believe that she didn't even know it. Her hair falling in luscious curls, framing her face; her delicate cheeks which were turning pink in the cold of the dungeons. And those eyes, so big and chocolaty brown…

I found myself smiling at her. She stared back silently, her shock echoing around the room. Her expression was one of complete disbelief. It looked like she'd just been slapped in the face. I positively grinned at her, enjoying the sensation I was causing in her. I knew what she was thinking: if I was capable of smiling, maybe I wasn't as bad as I seemed.

I kept my smile as I said, 'Just one minute, Miss Granger.' Then I returned to my letter. It was best to get it out the way. No distractions.

I finished the letter and rolled it up, sighing softly. I looked up again and found she was still standing in exactly the same spot, staring at me like I'd grown another head. I hadn't realised that something as simple as a smile could cause such an effect in someone. But then again, I thought, smiling was something I very, _very_ rarely did in front of students.

I stood up, and pointed to the seat opposite the desk. 'Take a seat, please.' It was only a request, yet she did so immediately. I was still the teacher. She was still the student.

I waited, looking down at my desk, until she was comfortable before I attempted to speak. But as I raised my head to look at her face properly I saw that she too was avoiding my gaze. Again I found myself smiling, in spite of myself. I had asked her here so I could be honest, so I could apologize; but now it seemed I could do nothing but grin at her. I sighed, forcing myself to be serious, and dropped the smile.

I opened my mouth to speak but suddenly I didn't quite know where to begin. How could I say what I needed to say without sounding like an insane pervert?

Luckily, my sensible side kicked in. _Apologize first_.

I looked back down at my hands. I was suddenly shy of her. 'Miss Granger,' I began slowly, 'I wanted to talk to you about what happened yesterday in Potions.' I paused, unsure of myself. 'More specifically,' I worded myself clearly, 'I wanted to apologize for what I said.'

I waited, letting the words sink in. She didn't reply. I looked up, anxious to see what she was thinking. She was still staring at me, her mouth open in shock. But she didn't look upset…more like she was pleased, but still surprised.

But I still hadn't said the words I needed to say. And it was so important that I told her because I felt that this would be the only way for me to find out how she felt. I stared into her melted brown eyes as I whispered, 'I'm very sorry, Hermione.'

I had never said her name aloud to her before and it acted like a charm, seeming to slow time around us. I saw her eyes widen, her mouth drop, but she did not move, did not speak a single word, but continued to look at me. The fire I had seen in her face in Potions had been relit and I saw her lean surreptitiously towards me. The action sent my instincts into motion. I leaned forwards too, against my will, and my brain shut of completely. I couldn't think, couldn't breath, could only see those pink lips parting slightly…

And then suddenly she jumped up. I blinked, and it was like having cold water thrown over my head. I leaned back slowly, waiting to see what she would say.

But she didn't say anything, only turned to go.

I couldn't stand that. I saw my plan beginning to crumble. I had done this so that I could know how she felt, and she was just going to leave without saying a word?

I stood up, and I saw her reach for her wand.

My heart crumpled. I realised that she thought that I was some sick monster. She thought that I was going to attack her.

I did not reach for my wand. I didn't want to stop her from leaving. But I did want her to stay.

'Hermione, please. Can we just talk?' I had said her name again. It was nothing really, and yet is was everything. I didn't want to sound like I was pleading, but it came out sounding that way. I was saying everything I felt in that one phrase. I knew now. She knew what I so desperately wanted.

She began to back away from me cautiously.

She didn't want me at all.

She reached the door and she still didn't turn her back to me, still too afraid that I would attack her at the first chance. She turned the handle. She was going to leave.

My hand twitched. A part of me knew I could stop her if I wanted. But did I want to? No. I wanted her, I needed her, I could feel my heart beating thunderously in my chest, yearning. But I would not take her unwillingly.

I didn't speak, choosing to wait. Would she speak?

She opened the door, still facing me. I saw her stop, confused. She opened her mouth. My heart beat faster, anxiously. For better or worse I had to know how she felt.

But she hesitated, unsure. I knew she wasn't sure what to say.

Then she swayed. What was wrong? I peered at her face, she had gone pale. Too late, I saw her eyes roll back, and time seemed to slow down again as she began to fall sideways.

'Hermione!' I cried, rushing forward in an instant to grab her, my wand forgotten. I managed to reach her just before her head hit the hard stone floor. Crouching down beside her I didn't need to check to know that she had fainted. Perhaps it was from the shock of it all.

I looked up around me, and then stood up properly. Rushing out to the corridor I looked both ways but there was no one in sight. I hurried back next to Hermione and considered my options. I could carry her up to the Infirmary, but it was on the fourth floor and that was quite a walk, not to mention that half the school would probably witness it.

The last thing I wanted for Hermione was for her to have to deal with months of whispers and hurtful comments that would almost certainly arise if this happened. Even though she didn't want me, I couldn't stop caring for her.

On the other hand, my quarters were connected to my office. She had only fainted and I had several Revival Potions. She would be on her feet again in no time. I looked back down at her, frowning while I thought.

I would not do anything to her. She would be completely safe. And I would make sure she left as soon as she was revived.

I nodded to myself at this and, gently slid my hands under her back and knees; I lifted her up and carried her out of the room.


	7. Chapter 7

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot!

**Dedication:** This chapter is dedicated in particular to Marilyn Manson and Beethoven. 2 interesting men that, for some strange reason, remind me of Severus Snape.

**Author's Note**: Hello! Thanks to all of my fantastic reviewers! I love you guys :) Anyways, this is not a double chapter unfortunatley, but I didnt want to leave anyone waiting for too long. Next chapter up soon. This is a little more explicit than the other chapters, but not really. Let me know if you do/don't like where this is heading. Read and Review please.

Recap: Hermione's fainted in Snape's office. Where is she now, and where is Snape?

**A Yearning - Chapter 7**

_Hermione_ –

I opened my eyes blearily. Where was I? I had no idea.

I was lying down on something soft and cushioning in a semi-dark place. It was not cold, though. I turned my head to the side and saw a fire blazing, filling the air with cosy warmth.

But with only the light of the fire for me to see by, I could not discern the rest of the room from the darkness. I half-sat up slowly. My whole body felt slow, sluggish.

I took a better look around. I was in a room, lying on someone's bed. This was not the Infirmary, this was someone's bedroom. I tried to sit up fully but my brain was working in slow motion, my head spinning. I laid back down on the bed, again, slowly; and tried to think.

What had happened? I closed my eyes, trying to think about where I had been last.

_I had been in the dungeons, in Snape's office and_–

Then all the memories came rushing back. Snape had called me to his office to profess what he wanted, and he wanted _me_. I opened my eyes, but continued to go over what had happened.

He hadn't said the words to me, I thought silently, but it was obvious. He had made it clear. There had been that moment– my breath caught in my throat, I had remembered how we had nearly kissed, how close we had been. And I had wanted to kiss him…

I closed my eyes, trying to physically avoid the thought. _But you didn't kiss him though, did you? _I said to myself. No. I hadn't. I had walked away. And I had thought, perhaps, that he would try to stop me. I had raised my wand to him, but he had done nothing. He had let me leave.

_Then what happened?_ I prodded my own mind, which I found was beginning to lose its sluggishness. I closed my eyes, concentrating. I had walked backwards, watching him. I had reached the door, was about to leave when–

'When I fell over.' I said aloud. Why did I fall, though? I opened my eyes and stared at the shadows on the ceiling. But the answer came to me before I even realised it. 'I fainted!'

I was surprised at myself. I had never fainted before. For an instant I tried to remember what it had felt like, but I couldn't. 'Well, that's probably because you had fainted by that stage, Hermione' I said to myself, annoyed at my own stupidity.

So I had fainted. So where was I now then? I sat up again, and this time the room didn't spin around me and my head was clearer.

Yes, I was definitely in someone's bedroom. I was on the bed, and I could see the dark outlines of a wardrobe, a chest of drawers, a table and some chairs amongst the shadows of the flickering fire. It seemed like a cosy place, but there were no windows, and no portraits that I could see. I decided it was something like a cross between the Gryffindor common room and Hagrid's hut.

I decided to investigate the room more closely. I stood up, finding to my relief that I could walk.

I went to the fireplace and looked at the mantle piece. There were no photos on it, but there was a rather impressive display of books, many of which looked very old and worn out, even in the firelight. I wanted to take one off and have a better look but they weren't mine, so I resisted the temptation and turned my back to the fire. Moving over to the table, I found a copy of the Daily Prophet and some more books lying there, although these did not look ancient. There was also a large stack of parchment on the other side of the table. As I could see nothing else in the room that might lead me to identify where I was; I went to take a closer look at them.

I picked the topmost sheet of the stack and looked at it, and even with the light so dim I recognised what it was immediately. An essay. It only took another half-second to notice the word "potions" written at the top of it, and my stomach turned over as I realised where I was. I was in Snape's bedroom!

The world seemed to shrink around me. I gasped, still looking down at the essay. I was wrapped up so tightly in the horror of my situation that I didn't hear the door open before it was too late.

His voice was calm and soft. 'Hello, Hermione.'

If possible, my heart started thumping faster and harder than it had ever done before in my life. I thought it would beat straight through my chest as I raised my head slowly, trembling uncontrollably, to meet Severus Snape's eyes.

He stood in the doorway, blocking the outside light, staring at me. I couldn't see his expression in the shadow, but the glint of light in his dark eyes made my heart leap into my throat.

He started to move towards me, and I didn't try to stop him. I was frozen. Never before had I felt so utterly terrified. My head was screaming: _Get your wand, Hermione! Strike him now, while you can!_ But my hand made no attempt to do so. I could only stare, my eyes so big I thought they might pop.

He was closer, closing in on me. Images of him pushing me on to the bed, wrenching off my clothes, hitting and slapping me, forcing me to do things, forcing himself into me; entered my head, making me want to be sick. But I still couldn't move, couldn't scream; couldn't do a thing to save myself.

He was right in front of me now. I closed my eyes, waiting for him; my body tensed. I didn't want to see his eyes, those eyes that I had once stared into dreamily. I felt his hands touch the back of my head gently, and tears began to leak out of my eyes in anger and terror as I realised I had allowed myself to be caught in this trap. I had not defended myself, I had allowed him to get this far.

He spoke softly and his voice seemed to echo through my head, disintegrating any of my own thoughts. 'Does your head hurt? I can't feel any bumps.' I felt his hands let go of my head.

It took me a few seconds to realise what he had said, and my eyes flew open with shock. He was standing close to me, looking down at me with a frown, worry lines creasing his forehead.

'What?' I gasped. His voice must have momentarily blocked off the flow of oxygen to my brain because I suddenly felt as blank as a blackboard.

His frown deepened, 'Hmmm. Maybe it hasn't worn off yet.' He seemed to be talking to himself more than to me as he pulled out a chair from near the table. 'You fainted. Don't worry; it's normal to feel lethargic after taking a Revival Potion.' He motioned for me to sit down. I did so, feeling the blush creeping up my cheeks.

I stared down at the table silently. Snape had put me here so I could rest my head and recover, not to rape me and do god only knows what else. The more I thought about it, the more it made sense. It seemed so obvious now. He had not taken me to the Infirmary because it was too far to carry me there. I considered what might have happened if he had. People would have seen, of course, and there would have been rumours about it for weeks, maybe even months. _Snape must have known that_, I thought. I felt the shame well up in me. He had taken me to his own room, despite the risk it would have been to his job, to save me from the gossip.

I forced myself to look up at him. He had sat down at the table too, looking like he could see straight through me. He seemed to know what I was thinking.

'You thought I was going to attack you, didn't you?' He said it quietly. I found I couldn't look him in the eye. 'Yes' I replied softly, staring at my lap.

He was silent for a moment, and then he asked 'Why didn't you try to defend yourself? You still have your wand.' He spoke calmly, softly; but I heard the crack in his voice. It made it even more impossible for me to speak, for me to look at him. I turned away from him, and shook my head. How could I explain to him the terror I had felt, when he had only wanted to make sure I was safe; when I knew he was sitting across from me with that heart-wrenching look of concern written all over his face?

I still had my head turned away from him when he spoke again, breaking the silence. 'Well, you seem perfectly sound, now. I'm sure you want to leave.' He sounded unbearably sad. I quickly turned to look at him but he had already gotten up and was moving towards the door.

'Wait!' I blurted out. He stopped but didn't turn. 'I'm sorry,' I whispered, and I felt the tears begin to fall, staining my cheeks.

He had heard me. Slowly turning, I saw his face in the firelight. He still looked terribly sad and I realised in that instant that he was sad because of _me_. He wanted me desperately and instead of telling him how I felt, I had branded him as some kind of monster. The realisation of this, far from shocking me, cleared my head.

Suddenly, I knew _exactly_ what I wanted to do. Like in a dream, I stood up and took a step towards him, then another. He didn't move a muscle as I moved towards him, but I saw his eyes widen slightly and his hands fall limply to his sides. It seemed that the roles had now reversed. He was now acting exactly how I had when he had entered the room. For some reason, this caused a bubble of laughter to escape from my throat, though my heart was fluttering faster than a hummingbird. Was I really okay? Was this really what I should be doing? I didn't know and right then, I didn't care.

I was so close to him that I could have heard him breathing, but he seemed to be holding his breath. I moved so I was right against him, but not touching. _Not yet_, I thought.

I looked up at him. He was taller than me, my eyes level with his chin. I stared into his eyes, fathomless in the darkness of the room. 'I'm sorry.' I repeated softly. He didn't move, only looked at me. I lifted my arms around him slowly and rested them on his back.

He closed his eyes suddenly at my touch, but I didn't wait for any further reaction. Steadily, I slid my hands up his back, gently massaging the back of his neck and letting my fingers run through his hair with one hand, my other sliding up and down his upper back.

His eyes flew open. 'Hermione?' he whispered softly, his voice and eyes filled with surprise.

I held my face inches from his, and I was hardly aware of what I was doing. Now my body was touching his, pressing gently against it. 'Severus' I whispered back, my heart thumping. I had never said his name aloud before and it had an instant effect. Something seemed to click in his expression and his eyes flashed. All this I noticed in an instant, and then suddenly he leaned down and his lips were on mine.

My eyes widened in surprise and I gave a small _mmph_ as his lips crashed into mine. But my body was ready before my brain. I opened my mouth to his, giving way to him. Leaning forward, I pressed myself even closer against him, eyes shut; and my arms entwined around his neck.

His desperateness was so evident. His kiss became harder as he placed his hands on my back, stroking it in small circles, and I felt his warm tongue slide into my mouth. Eagerly, I replied by opening my mouth a little wider, allowing him to explore me for a while, enjoying the languorous movements he made. Then I grew bolder and decided to explore _him_, and I curiously poked my tongue into his mouth. Almost immediately his tongue met mine and his hands locked around me. I thought he might begin to ravish my mouth more fervently, but it seemed to have the opposite effect. He immediately slowed down, our tongues slowly swirling, sliding around and around. Nothing moved except for our mouths. We were locked together; the only thing that existed was this kiss.

Slowly, I drifted back out into real-life. I broke apart from him, but remained locked in his embrace. I looked up into his face, utterly shocked at what we had just done, and his expression seemed to reflect exactly what I was thinking…and more.

For the second time that day (had this all really happened in one day? I couldn't believe it!), Severus smiled at me; that same gorgeous smile which showed me a different man to the one I had known these past six years.

He was still smiling at me while I was thinking about this. 'What?' I asked. He removed one of his hands to stroke my cheek 'You're forgiven.'

It took me a moment to realise that he was talking about my apology. It seemed like an age ago, yet it had only been a few minutes. I laughed, surprisingly relaxed around this man. It should have been extremely uncomfortable to have a conversation with my teacher right after I had just kissed him, but I found myself looking at him in a new light. He was no longer Snape, the weird, crabby teacher. He was Severus. He was just a man; someone I really wanted to know more about.

Suddenly a bell chimed. The room was so silent I nearly jumped, except Severus was still holding me. 'It's lunch time' Severus said softly, answering the question I had been about to ask.

'Damn!' I said, leaning into his chest for a moment. I peered up at him; he was looking at me questioningly. 'Harry and Ron will have been wondering where I've been' I explained. He closed his eyes and nodded, silent.

I looked at his face anxiously, trying to read any expression there. Was he angry? Upset? Did he know that I would rather have stayed here with him, than go see Ron and Harry? Did he realise how much I wanted him to kiss me again?

'Severus?' I asked tentatively.

He opened his eyes, surprised; as though he had only just realised that I was there. 'Yes, of course. They will all be wondering where you were.' He said it automatically, and took his hand away from my face.

'I- I won't say anything about- well- about what just happened.' I said quickly. Severus said nothing, but nodded again. Silence surrounded us as I tried to think of something to say. I felt his hand slide off my back and I suddenly panicked, blurting out 'You know that I want to come back, right? I- I don't want this to end just like this.'

Severus remained frozen, though I thought I saw something soften in his eyes. After what seemed like forever, he gave me a small smile. 'Really?' he asked, his hand back on my cheek. I nodded, lifting my hands around his neck and kissing him once, very softly and then wiggling out of his grasp. I walked towards the door.

'I'll come back later. Tonight.' The words were out of my mouth before I knew what I was saying. Severus looked at me, surprised. 'Are you sure?'

I wasn't completely, but I nodded anyway. He wasn't fooled. 'Hermione, please don't rush anything.' He looked a little worried. I smiled, 'I don't rush things. I'll come down here later tonight, then we can talk this through' I added, reaching the door.

'Alright then Hermione.' He still looked worried. I smiled once more at his frowning face before walking out the door and out into the dungeon corridor, wondering what the hell I was going to say to Harry and Ron.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, only my pathetic plot!

**Author's Note**: Another quick update! Aren't I good? Sorry if this chapter isn't that fantastic but I have an exam tomorrow so I really need to study. Plus, it's much harder for me to write Snape's POV for some reason. Not sure when the next chapter will be up but i don't think it will be very soon. Thanks for the reviews guys and keep up the Read and Review!

Recap: So Hermione and Sev got a little steamy. This is Snape's point of view from when Hermione faints.

**A Yearning - Chapter 8**

_Severus –_

She wasn't heavy at all. As I carried Hermione to my room adjoining the office, she felt incredibly light. Or perhaps I was simply stronger than I thought.

My hands were obviously full so I kicked the door open and carefully wound my way around my room. There was no light to see by, except that which came from outside the door. As the dungeons were all beneath the Lake, there were no windows and hardly any light at all.

Carefully, gently, I laid her down on my bed. I peered down at her through the dimness. She was perfectly still, her skin pale and delicate. An old memory flashed through me, as I remembered how I had seen others look very much like that, although they had been dead and it had been I that had been the perpetrator…

I stood up sharply and turned away, groping for my wand. My Death Eater days had ended many years ago, but I had done things that I could never forget; and sometimes the nightmares–

I found my wand. Flicking it at the fireplace, flames burst out of thin air, filling the room with warmth. Similarly, I flicked my wand at the candles around the room and their tiny flames created light.

I turned back around to Hermione. She had not moved, but the glow of the candles brightened her skin. To my relief, she looked warm, alive, and peaceful.

Almost against my will, I found myself move closer, leaning over her. I was so incredibly close to her, yet she had no idea. And then suddenly my emotions turned on me. I couldn't stop myself. My mind turned nasty. _Go on then, take her_, the Death Eater in my head whispered to me. _Take her now. She's all yours._ I remained frozen, looking down at her. _You can do anything you want to her Severus, and she won't be able to do a thing. No one will hear her screams–_

'No' I whispered. 'No, I'm not that person anymore. Hermione is safe.' I closed my eyes to the pain. She would not have me, and the only way I could have her was to force her, torment her. I stood up again, this time walking out of the room.

I stood outside the door, breathing heavily. I would never take her by force. _Never_. But deep inside I still knew that there was a part of me that would love to.

I had not harmed a soul in seventeen years. Would Hermione be my undoing?

I refused to contemplate it. Scowling, I strode over to my potions cabinet and grabbed a Revival Potion from the shelf, slamming the doors behind me as I walked back to my room. Breathing heavily to calm myself down, I walked in. She was still out cold.

Striding purposefully towards her, I uncorked the bottle. Gently, I opened her mouth and poured some of the thick golden liquid down her throat. The effect was instantaneous. She immediately stirred a little and then fell into sleep.

But my hand was still on her mouth, my thumb tracing the outline of her lower lip. I realised what I was doing after a moment, and yanked my hand away. _Stop it Severus! Don't let yourself lose control! _

I picked up the bottle and turned away. I knew it would take a while for her to awake. Knowing full well that I would have to return and tell her what happened, I walked out of the room without a backwards glance. I thought I had caused enough damage for one day.

*~*

It had been twenty minutes. I had spent them sitting in my office, trying to mark more essays. However, this was proving very difficult to do as I had left them in my room. Not wanting to go back in, I sat there twiddling my thumbs; behaving like a complete prat.

But it had been twenty minutes. Surely she must have awoken by now. Still, I wasn't sure if I wanted to go back in there. I didn't want to know how she would react.

Perhaps she might believe that I had simply thought it best to place her in my bedroom when she fainted. Maybe she would forget about what nearly happened just now in my office, when we had nearly kissed…

My stomach did an involuntary flip as I thought this over. It seemed unlikely that someone as sharp and intelligent as Hermione Granger would ever believe that that event was completely innocent. She had raised her wand to me just before, I thought, so it was more likely she believed I was going to attack her again, that perhaps I had brought her to my room for that very purpose…

My heart sunk and I felt the guilt spread through me like a curse because I _had_ very nearly done that.

_Or perhaps_, said some insanely optimistic part of my brain, _perhaps she'll realise that you love her after all and that she feels the same._ 'Yes, and perhaps I'll get a letter right now saying I've become the Minister for Magic and that I've won three hundred thousand Galleons, and we'll all live happily ever after' I said angrily.

I stood up and bitterly stomped across the office, the door to my room opening silently. Still in the doorway I saw Hermione. She was over by my table, reading something. My anger vanished immediately. How could I remain upset when she was near me?

'Hello, Hermione' I said softly, not wanting to scare her.

She did not move. At first I thought that she simply had not heard me, but then I realised that she had actually frozen. Slowly, she looked up at me from across the room, her eyes wide as though I had caught her doing something wrong.

She seemed okay from what I could see, but I wanted to make sure that her head hadn't been injured. I walked towards her, half expecting her to back away or at least raise her wand to me. She did neither, simply standing stock-still, her eyes huge. It might have been comical in another situation but my earlier presumptions were being proven correct. I wondered why she wasn't trying to defend herself because I knew she must have thought I was going to harm her, but then I realised that she was probably too terrified to do anything at all.

Nearing her, I cautiously reached out my hands and gently felt the back of her head, searching for any signs of a bruise and trying not to notice how soft her hair was; but I didn't find anything. 'Does your head hurt? I can't feel any bumps' I asked, making myself pull my hands away from her.

For a few moments she said nothing at all and I wondered briefly if her head had been affected from the faint after all. But then she seemed to recover herself, gasping 'What?'

I frowned. Was she okay? 'Hmmm. Maybe it hasn't worn off yet,' I said to myself. Sometimes Revival Potions could do more harm than good.

'You fainted.' I busied myself by getting her a chair. 'Don't worry; it's normal to feel lethargic after taking a Revival Potion.' I motioned for her to sit. To my surprise, I saw her blush deeply. Was that normal after taking a Revival Potion? I couldn't ever recall reading that blushing was a side effect. My frown deepened.

I grabbed a chair and sat down too. I didn't want to say anything at first, hoping she would break the silence; but she sat quite still, looking down at her lap. I couldn't see her expression in the semi-dark. Suddenly, I couldn't hold it in. 'You thought I was going to attack you, didn't you?' I was surprised to hear my voice sound so calm, and was glad I hadn't come across sounding accusatory.

I thought perhaps she wouldn't answer, but she replied 'Yes,' her voice tiny. I wanted her to look at me, to give me some idea of what she was thinking, but she was still staring at her hands, avoiding me.

Finally I said, 'Why didn't you try to defend yourself? You still have your wand.' I wasn't sure why I asked her that. I had already realised that she had been too terrified to do anything, although we both knew that she could never have stood against me even if she tried. She shook her head and turned away from me, apparently unable to speak. Suddenly, I was angry at myself again. I had now scared her twice in less than an hour. Why was I asking her these questions? Hadn't she suffered enough?

I got up. 'Well, you seem perfectly sound, now. I'm sure you want to leave.' I moved away from her, unable to look anymore. I was too angry at myself, too ashamed. I had almost reached the door when I heard her: 'Wait!'

I froze. Was she going to torment me further? I almost kept walking; I didn't think I could bear anymore. But then she said something that nearly made my heart stop.

'I'm sorry.'

It was barely a whisper, yet it seemed to fill my head up completely. I could hear nothing else. I turned around slowly. Had I heard her right or was this just imagination playing a cruel joke?

She was still sitting down, tears glistening on her cheeks. But there was something different; it was the way she was looking at me. Was she sorry that she couldn't return my feelings? Or was she sorry for something else?

Hermione stood up and walked towards me. Shock coursed through my body, gluing my feet to the floor. My mind went numb. I could do nothing, could say nothing as she stood right in front of me. She laughed softly, and it brought me straight back to earth. Is this a bizarre dream? I asked myself. It has to be, how else could this possibly be happening? I was starting to believe that it must be a dream when she spoke again.

'I'm sorry' she repeated softly. I looked down at her. She was so close, much closer than we had been in my office. I could see her in technicolour detail: the curves of her lips, every eyelash; I could even see my reflection shining in her deep brown eyes.

I wanted to touch her then, to grasp her tightly and pull her towards me; but I still couldn't. I felt like my body was in a full Body-Bind. But then she surprised me. Lifting her slender arms underneath mine, she gently slid them along my back. I closed my eyes, holding in the gasp I so wanted to release. Her touch sent my ardour on fire as I felt her hands slide up and up; teasing the nape of my neck with her bare touch, and running her fingers through my hair.

I opened my eyes, amazed. 'Hermione?' I whispered, finding my voice, finally.

She responded by moving even closer to me, pressing into my chest. She looked up at me, her lips inches from mine.

'Severus' she whispered back. It was not a question, it was a confirmation. Hearing her say my name was like being slapped awake. Without thinking, I bent down and kissed her full on the mouth.

My brain might have switched off but my instincts were fully functioning. I heard her give a cry of surprise, but I merely pressed myself harder against her. Her mouth opened slightly to give way to me and I felt her lean into my chest. I took this as a sign of approval and eagerly wrapped my arms around her back, wanting to be as close as possible to her. Rhythmically, I began to stroke her back, starting low and working my way up. She kissed me harder and opened her mouth wider, allowing me full access. My tongue slid into her mouth and expertly began to search her, tasting her sweetness while I felt her hands trailing up and down my back. I think, at first, she did not know how to respond. Then, to my delight, her tongue found mine and I slowed down my pace to meet hers. For a while, we simply stood there, nothing but our tongues moving, as we slowly made sweet love with just our mouths.

Eventually we broke apart. I looked down at her, my heart beating fast. I was shocked at what she had just done, but incredibly elated all the same. She had removed her arms from around me, but I kept mine on her. I didn't want to let her go. I had had a taste of her and now I wanted more.

'What?' Hermione asked as she smiled at me. I couldn't resist stroking her cheek as I smiled back. I knew she was referring to my expression. Some of my lust must have shown on my face. 'You're forgiven,' I replied, amused. She laughed.

I would have stayed like that, smiling and holding her if it wasn't for the clock. It chimed, causing her to start. 'It's lunch time' I stated, as her mouth had opened to ask.

'Damn!' she pressed against me again and then replied 'Harry and Ron will have been wondering where I've been' when I raised an eyebrow. I nodded silently.

Closing my eyes I cursed myself. I had been so stupid. I had forgotten, in my desire, that Hermione was a student and I was a Professor. This was the real world and things like this were bound to not go unnoticed. Had I ever really imagined that something between myself and Hermione could ever happen?

'Severus?' I opened my eyes and found her staring anxiously at me. The sound of her saying my name made me want to seize her in my arms and kiss her again, but I forced myself not to get carried away.

'Yes, of course. They will all be wondering where you were.' I looked away from her and took my hand off of her face, trying to remain detached.

Hermione wasn't an idiot. She realised something was wrong straight away.

'I- I won't say anything about- well- about what just happened.' She stuttered. I looked at her. Was she embarrassed or upset about what we had done? Was she regretting it already? I felt the anger rise up in me, but forced myself not to lose control. I nodded again and took my hands off her.

'You know that I want to come back, right?' She blurted out suddenly. I stared at her. 'I- I don't want this to end just like this' she continued, trying to explain. My ears almost perked up. Did that mean she wanted this to continue?

She was looking at me imploringly and I felt a smile pull at my lips. 'Really?' I murmured, my hands moving instinctively to her face, tracing the curve of her jaw. Hermione nodded and, lifting her hands around my neck, she kissed me briefly before stepping out of my hold.

I sighed softly as she walked towards the door. 'I'll come back later. Tonight' she added as she turned to look at me. My eyes widened. Did she mean what I thought she meant?

'A-are you sure?' I asked, surprised at how confident she sounded. She nodded and then I saw the glimmer of uncertainty in her face. 'Hermione, please don't rush anything' I said softly. I would have taken her there and then if she'd let me, but at the same time I wanted to wait. I wanted her to be completely open to me.

Hermione smiled at me from across the room. 'I don't rush things. I'll come down here later tonight, then we can talk this through' she said.

I stared at her blankly. Talk this through? I could have kicked myself for having been so presumptuous. I must have forgotten who I was talking to. _Of course_ Hermione would want to talk about this. She would want to make it clear exactly what her intentions were before anything more happened. Once again, I found myself being caught up in my yearning for her. 'Alright then Hermione' I said slowly, frowning at my own thoughts.

Far from looking upset, she simply smiled wider and breezed out of the room, leaving me to my lust and my worries.


	9. Chapter 9

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters...unfortunately

**Author's Note**: Yay! Next chapter's up! You might not like this chapter becuase there's a lot of talking in it, but its all necessary for future chapters, so bear with me. Please Read and Review, cuz you know it makes me happy.

Recap: Hermione's agreed to come back to Snape's office later that night for a "chat". Will it work out the way she wants? Read on, and find out....

**A Yearning - Chapter 9**

_Hermione_ –

I hurried up the dungeon corridor back to the Great Hall for lunch. I had just kissed Severus Snape! I wanted to rush up and tell someone – anyone – about it.

I could barely stop smiling, for how elated I felt. Looking back, I thought I must have sounded quite mature and confident back in Severus' room but now that I was alone I could barely suppress a squeal of excitement. In a normal situation I probably would have rolled my eyes if I found someone acting like this, but I did not think that snogging a professor was essentially under the category of _normal_. Still, I knew there was no way I could tell this to anyone and I was slightly disappointed.

As I raced up a flight of stairs I tried to imagine how someone – perhaps Ron or Harry – would react if I told them what had happened? Even if it wasn't Severus there would surely be hell to pay! I stopped outside the Entrance Hall, trying and failing to look as though I had not run all the way here as a group of sixth year Hufflepuff girls looked over at me strangely on their way in to lunch.

I was still panting slightly, my heart pounding from having run so fast. But was it purely that? No. I was completely invigorated by what had just happened between me and Severus. My skin was still prickling all over from his touch. For a minute I started drifted off into another fantasy of him, imagining the feel of his skin…but no! I had to regain control of myself! At least…for the moment, in any case.

I was about to enter the Great Hall and people would want to know what happened in Snape's office. It was laughable to hope that no one would know about it – Ginny had given me the message and most people had heard how I had run out of Potions the other day. Hogwarts was beautiful, and it was my home, but it was not a place where you could keep many secrets.

I looked at the House Points in the Entrance Hall, but I wasn't really looking at them. Harry and Ron would be very curious…but I was a terrible actress, dreadful at lying. I sighed, staring at the Gryffindor House Points, the rubies glinting. There was no choice really; I simply would just have to tell them the truth.

With this resolve, I strode into the Great Hall towards the Gryffindor table. I plopped my bag down next to Ron without a word and sat down. He and Harry had already started lunch without me, and Ron was speaking through a full mouth, as usual.

'Mione! Where've oo bee? Awy an' I– ' I held out a hand to stop Ron.

'Ron, don't talk with your mouth full! Didn't Ginny tell you what happened?' I looked carefully at Harry. He nodded and picked up a drumstick.

'Yeah, Ginny said something about Snape wanting to see you, and you er, snubbing her off. What happened?'

I laughed. 'Oh well Ginny offered to come with me to see him but I said I'd rather go alone. I guess she just got a bit peeved.' I reached for the fruit bowl

'Yeah, but what did Snape want to see you about? He didn't yell at you again did he?' Ron had finished his mouthful, but immediately refilled after this question.

I kept my eyes fixed on the fruit bowl, pretending to inspect a pear. 'Oh. Well he just wanted to talk to me about what happened yesterday.' I bit into the pear.

They had both stopped eating. 'What did he say?' Harry said.

'Well, he…said sorry.' I could not suppress a blush. Harry and Ron's mouths were gaping.

'WHAT?' they both cried together.

I focused my gaze on my pear, 'He- he just said that he was sorry for what he'd said yesterday.'

Neither Harry nor Ron moved. They seemed momentarily paralysed by shock. Harry recovered first. Shaking his head he said 'No way, Hermione. Snape say sorry? Nuh uh.'

I nodded, taking another bite. 'That's what he said!'

Ron chimed in, 'That's just not possible. Snape? _Sorry?_ I don't believe it.'

I was starting to get a bit annoyed. 'Well you better believe it, because it's true!'

Ron was looking amused, 'So what did you say to him? I'd have called him a slimy wart-faced git at the very least.'

My annoyance was raised up a notch. 'Look, he just said sorry! I didn't really say much at all.' That was true enough!

Harry sensed my anger flaring and hastily changed the topic slightly. 'So where've you been all morning then? You could have come outside.'

I munched on my pear again, carefully avoiding his eyes. 'Sorry, I just kind of got…caught up in something. I really just lost track of the time.' Well that was _kind of_ the truth, wasn't it?

'That reminds me,' I added, 'don't you two have essays to write this afternoon?' I wanted to change the subject now before things got out of hand. Fortunately, it worked.

'Shit! I forgot about that! We've got that essay for Sprout to do by Wednesday, and Snape wants two and a half feet on the uses of dittany in anti-venoms!' He peered at me anxiously.

I rolled my eyes, having finished both essays two days earlier. Still, the casual use of Severus' name made my heart leap. 'Alright, I'll help you both. But this is the _last_ _time_!' Ron nodded gravely, Harry trying to look as though he believed me.

After that, the conversation changed to Quidditch and homework, and I fazed out, thinking only of Severus and his dark, dark eyes.

*~*

The day passed by more slowly than I had thought possible. Harry, Ron and I stayed in the library all afternoon, the Common Room being too full due to the heavy rain now falling outside.

Although I managed to keep up the pretence that everything was completely normal, I was becoming increasingly excited and impatient about seeing Severus again.

I did not know what exactly would happen when I saw him, but I knew we did have to talk about us. _Us_. It almost sounded like we were already an item, a couple. Were we? Did he think we were? Or did he think of me as a fling, something of no real significance?

These questions worried me, but my day had been busy enough. I did not know what to think, so wisely, I tried to put it all out of my head, assuring myself that everything would be sorted later.

However, there was one thing that I had not yet figured out: how to get back down to Severus' office without being seen. It would be night time; and although I was Head Girl, I would hardly be able to find an excuse to be down in the dungeons close to midnight. It was after dinner that I decided there would only be one way to get around it. So although I _really_ didn't want to have to do it, I knew the only way I could get there was if I lied…to Harry.

We were sitting in the Common Room that night, Harry and Ron finishing their Herbology while I read quietly. It was getting later and later; and sure enough, soon we were the last three people left. Everyone else had gone to bed.

Ron threw down his quill and yawned.

'God, I'm knackered! Harry you finished yet? I wanna get some sleep.'

Thankfully, Harry had not yet finished his essay. 'You go up, Ron. I'm nearly done. Just gotta re-do this conclusion.' He crossed out a sentence as Ron rolled up his parchment.

'Okay then. What about you 'Mione?' Ron looked at me blearily.

I shook my head. 'I want to finish this chapter first. Night Ron.' Ron waved sleepily over his shoulder and left.

Harry sighed, 'I am never going to leave my homework this late again. _Ever_' he added, looking up at the clock. I rolled my eyes. 'Harry, you always say that. _Eick_!'

I squeaked this last part dramatically.

I looked up at Harry's questioning expression in horror, 'Oh my gosh! I completely forgot! This book was due back at the library today!'

The book, of course, was not overdue at the library; being one of my new books bought at Hogsmeade. However, it was late and Harry was tired. I knew I could play this to my advantage.

Harry rubbed one of his eyes from underneath his glasses. 'So? Just return the book tomorrow.'

I dropped my mouth, 'Harry! I'm going to get into loads of trouble for this! I'm Head Girl!'

Harry stared at me. 'So what are you going to do? It's too late to take it back now, the library's closed anyway. Just forget about it.' He started rolling up his parchment.

I sighed dramatically and closed the book, then, just as Harry was turning away I gasped loudly, making him jump. 'What?' he cried.

I jumped out of my chair, 'Your cloak!'

'What?' he said again.

'Harry, lend me the cloak! I'll take the book back that way.' I tried to make it sound like I had only just thought about this.

Harry frowned. 'Hermione, it's just a book!' He sighed at my expression. 'Look, if you get caught– '

'Harry, I won't get caught! It's an Invisibility Cloak, for goodness sake.' I stopped. 'Please, Harry? _Please_?'

I gave him a pleading look. Harry was too tired to argue with me. 'Fine, take it. But if Filch catches you…' He pulled the cloak out of his pocket and tossed it to me.

I wanted to run up and give him a hug. I also really wanted to say sorry because as far as I could remember, I had never lied to Harry about something. But I didn't do either of those things. Tossing the cloak around me, I picked up the book. 'Thanks, Harry.'

'Goodnight.'

'Night.'

I turned and hurried out of the portrait hole, the Fat Lady snoring loudly. I checked around me. The corridor was empty. Walking briskly, I hurried along it.

I made it all the way down three floors before meeting anyone. I was running past the Infirmary when I saw Mrs Norris, her great yellow orb-like eyes glaring at me. She wasn't moving, but remained frozen, staring at me like she could see straight through the cloak. My breathing got louder, as I remained stock-still where I was, trying to convince myself that she could not see me.

After what felt like ages, she finally turned away, slinking back into the darkness. I let out a sigh of relief and Mrs Norris' head whipped around suddenly, staring intently at me again!

I froze up. _Shit, shit, shit, shit!_ I thought silently. _Hermione just shut UP! _Again, Mrs Norris stared at me. She stared and stared and stared. Unmoving. I was just beginning to think that she would leave soon; Mrs Norris suddenly started to run right towards me! I opened my mouth in horror but remained were I stood, watching as she took a flying leap and landed right on me.

Taken completely by surprise, I let out a yell and fell backwards onto the ground, hitting my head on a hard, lumpy surface as I did so. I felt something crash to the floor behind me and I knew I had hit something, but at that moment I didn't care. Mrs Norris' long claws dug into my arms, my chest, and my neck; as I tried to push her off me. The hot scratches stung and seemed to flip my head over; suddenly I was seething. I rolled over with her still attached, and began to hit her with all my strength. I did not know where my wand was, the cloak was twisted all around me as, hissing and spitting, Mrs Norris lashed out at me, scratching me and trying to latch onto my face. Suddenly, she retreated, meow-ing loudly. A bright light shone in my face. I got up, ignoring the painful throbbing of the back of my head. All I wanted to do was find that dreaded cat and do her a serious injury.

The light followed my as I got up, shining so brightly I couldn't see. Before I could yell at them to get the light out of my eyes I heard a raspy voice: 'What's going on here? What in Merlin's name have you been doing to my cat, girl?!' It was Filch.

Usually, students could bear pretty well with Filch. Sure, he was a bitter old sod and hated students more than anything, but usually he kept his annoying behaviour limited to Fanged Frisbees and Dungbombs. Apart from my adventures with Harry and Ron, I had always done my best to avoid him and until now, that had rarely seemed a problem. Unfortunately for him, I was so angry standing there, having just been attacked by his evil cat, that I felt ready to hex him.

As I was seething silently, trying to catch my breath and avoid blindness, Filch was still yelling abuse at me. 'How dare you! You've been attacking poor Mrs Norris! And what are you doing out of bed at this time? I know,' he yelled, before I could even open my mouth, 'I know _exactly_ what you've been doing! You've done this on purpose, you have! You think old Filch is stupid, but he's smart, eh!'

He leaned in close to me. It didn't know whether it was an improvement or not: he had at least taken away the lamp from my eyes, but now I was seeing Filch's face inches from mine, his face leering and furious. I leaned backwards, hastily.

'You've been waiting here! And don't think I can't guess who for!' he continued, a victorious expression on his face. He looked like he had just been told he had won the lottery.

My heart started beating fast, pulsing rhythmically in time with my head, which was still aching. He thought I was waiting for someone. Could he possibly know…?

'My cat!' Filch yelled triumphantly into my face. I winced, as my head throbbed harder.

'What are you talking about?' I finally managed to get in a word. I wanted to yell back at him but my head felt like it was swollen.

'Ha! Don't pretend you don't know! You came down here and waited til you saw Mrs Norris! You planned this attack all along!' Filch yelled.

He's mad, I thought. 'You're mad' I stated, somewhat calmly. The pain in my head was preventing me from speaking too loudly, or too quickly.

At this, Filch seemed to swell like a bullfrog, but before he could open his mouth, I heard two people round the corner, panting. I looked up to see Professor McGonagall and, to my delight, Severus. They stopped next to Filch.

'Filch? Miss Granger? What in Merlin's name is going on here!?' Professor McGonagall cried. She looked back and forth from me, standing there with the Invisibility Cloak twisted around my legs, to Filch, who was pointing his lamp at me like a weapon, Mrs Norris prowling around his feet.

Filch got in before I had a chance to open my mouth. 'I caught her attacking Mrs Norris, Professor. She was waiting here for her, waiting to attack her. Then I caught her in the act, I did' Filch finished proudly.

The few moments of lack of yelling had allowed my head to clear a little. 'I wasn't trying to attack her, you idiot!' I found myself shouting at Filch. 'I was walking down the corridor when your evil cat flung itself at me and started scratching my eyes out!' I stood there, glaring at Filch. I had never felt so angry in all my life.

Filch stood there, glaring right on back. I did not turn to see Severus' expression and I was too furious to care what McGonagall might do to me.

'Miss Granger, that is quite enough!' Professor McGonagall seemed shocked at my outburst. I had never yelled at a member of staff before. I had always been the model student.

'Miss Granger– no, Filch! Let me speak! Now, Miss Granger, I do not want to believe that you were up here specifically for the purpose of attacking Mrs Norris. So I am asking you, Miss Granger, if you were not trying to attack the cat, what exactly were you doing up here in the first place?' McGonagall looked both angry and flustered. I still had not looked at Severus yet. I didn't trust myself to be able to lie convincingly if I did.

'I wanted to return a library book, Professor. I forgot that it was due today, so I took Harry's Cloak and stole up here so I could return it. Then Mrs Norris saw me and leapt on me.' I glared at Filch and Mrs Norris again, before turning around to look at the floor behind me. I had been right; a statue lay broken on the floor: I must have hit my head on it as I fell. 'I accidentally broke this statue, too' I pointed out unnecessarily. I groped my pocket for my wand but I couldn't find it.

'It's here,' came a quiet voice. I looked up to find Severus standing in front of me, holding out my wand in his hand, having picked it up from within the folds of the cloak still tangled around my legs. I took the wand and muttered the spell. The statue mended itself and stood upright. I looked at him. He was staring intently at me, unsmiling. I saw his fingers twitch. In the darkness, I shivered, though not from the cold. Severus seemed furious. Was he angry because I had allowed myself to get caught? Did he think I was just some stupid, silly little girl?

He stepped away from me and spoke in a clear voice, 'Well Minerva, it seems clear to me what exactly how we can solve this.'

Professor McGonagall raised her eyebrows, her lips pursed so tightly they seemed to shrink into nothing. 'Really, Severus? Would you care to explain then?'

'Certainly,' Severus nodded. I stared at him, my anger forgotten. Was he going to dob me in?

He walked back to where Professor McGonagall was standing. 'Miss Granger said she had to return a book. Do you have that book on you, Miss Granger?'

I nodded, and reached down to pick up my book, which I had dropped when Mrs Norris had flown at me. I held it up, silent.

McGonagall took one look at it and spoke up, 'Well, then it's obvious that Miss Granger is speaking the truth. She must have run into Mrs Norris, who– '

'Don't say Mrs Norris attacked her!' Filch interrupted loudly.

I opened my mouth angrily to reply but Severus got there first. 'Argus, the girl was setting out to the library to return a book. Her wand was lying on the floor and she is covered head to toe in scratches!' His voice got louder. 'I hardly think that, given the evidence, Miss Granger would seek out to fight a cat in the middle of the night without her wand!' he finished angrily. The air around us all seemed to grow thicker, but I felt nothing but relief. He was not angry with me after all.

McGonagall did not question Severus' anger, but continued in a calmer voice. 'Argus, I know you think best of your pet, but it seems in this case, that she simply sensed Miss Granger's presence and assaulted her. We cannot punish Mrs Norris for that,' she added, as Filch swelled again in anger, 'But you must keep her under control, otherwise the Headmaster may see to it that she can no longer stay at Hogwarts.' She spoke calmly, but there was no doubt about the threat there. Filch recognised it at once and, picking up Mrs Norris, he turned abruptly and hobbled away.

Professor McGonagall sighed, and scowling, walked closer to me. 'Miss Granger, you are well aware that it is forbidden to walk the corridors at midnight. Frankly, I am disappointed somewhat in you, Miss Granger. You are Head Girl, and you set an example not only to other Gryffindors, but to everyone here at Hogwarts.' She looked down at me, and I hung my head, ashamed at her discontent.

'However, I am aware that your intentions were fairly innocent.' I looked up, hopeful. McGonagall continued, 'So I am willingly to give you only one detention – tomorrow night – for this misdemeanour, rather than a week's worth, as I would have done with anyone else.' She paused, frowning. My head was beginning to throb again.

'What is it, Professor?' I asked tentatively. McGonagall continued to frown, 'I just recalled that I have another detention to preside for tomorrow night. And I have a week's worth of detentions to supervise because of Lee Jordan.' She sighed wearily. I was just hoping that she might call off the detention altogether, and perhaps let me get something for my aching head, when her face perked again.

Whipping around to face Severus she said to his astonished face, 'Professor Snape, would you mind supervising Hermione's detention? I would not ask, only you are already present.'

Severus' face remained impassive, 'Of course, Minerva. I am free tomorrow night. Miss Granger,' he turned to address me, 'You will meet me in my office for your deten– Miss Granger, what's wrong?' he said abruptly, looking anxiously at me.

I could no longer see straight. My vision, though bad enough in the near darkness, was swimming. I tried to focus on Severus' face, but felt myself slide backwards, away from him, instead. _No_, I thought. _I can't faint!_ I held out my hand and grabbed the statue for support. My head felt three times as large, and very cold. I felt something trickle down the back of my neck. Dropping my wand, I sluggishly felt my neck. There was something wet there. Peering at my hand through the haze, I saw a glint of red. I realised dimly that I had been bleeding all this time.

Severus, who was closer to me, noticed first. 'She's bleeding! Quickly, Minerva!' He added anxiously, as I felt my legs begin to give way. I couldn't seem to hold myself up any longer.

Suddenly, I was levitating. I noticed dimly, that Severus was standing by me, walking beside me as I floated; though I couldn't be sure through my vision. I didn't bother trying to talk, but as I felt something soft touch me, I sunk into blessed unconsciousness.


	10. Chapter 10

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters blah blah blah

**Author's Note**: Okay this chapter took a little while to write becuase of exams etc. I personally find this chapter incredibly boring as well, so that probably had something to do with it. Don't worry though: I'm now on uni holidays so I'll have MUCH more time to write. There should be another chapter coming up within a few days hopefully. And i can definatley promise you that there will be some lemons in the next few chapters too! Please keep Reviewing becuase reviews make me want to write!

Recap: Hermione gets attacked *gasp* by Mrs Norris and Snape arrives to save the day...er..night. What did he think about it? Well, read on..

**A Yearning - Chapter 10**

_Severus – _

I sat in my room, breathing heavily, once Hermione had left.

It was some time before I found the energy to move. Hermione's sudden departure had sucked the air out of the room, leaving me feeling momentarily empty.

Somehow, however, I managed to slap myself back to reality.

I got off my chair, took one look at the pile of unmarked essays on the table and, steeling myself, grabbed them and stalked out of the room; the door banging shut behind me. As much as I wanted to sit there and think slowly and carefully through all the possible fantasies I could soon be experiencing with Hermione, I didn't want to let myself get carried away. I reassured myself that there would be plenty time for that later.

I sat back down behind my office desk, trying to pretend that I had not just sat here looking across from Hermione only an hour or so earlier that day. But I must admit; it was very difficult indeed to sit there and mark sloppy essays when I could distinctly taste Hermione in my mouth. I closed my eyes, and my mind tried to dissuade me, but to no avail: she had kissed _me_; there was no need to hide anymore.

I caught myself grinning, and had to struggle to suppress it. _Stop it, Severus!_ My mind was shouting at me, _Kissing Hermione is one thing but for God sakes: control your damn emotions! What will people think if they see you smiling?_

'They'll probably think I'm enjoying myself' I replied aloud, rather sarcastically.

_Exactly!_ My conscience yelled triumphantly. _How suspicious would that look? Severus, you've never smiled at anything in your whole damn life!_

I threw down my quill angrily; about to retort loudly that perhaps I was sick of looking miserable, when I stopped. For a whole five seconds I stared straight ahead of me, realising that I was not only having an argument with my head, but I was fighting for the losing side.

'God, I am an idiot' I muttered, wrenching my head back down to the essays. But I couldn't concentrate now; I was just too damn irritated. I sighed loudly and rubbed my eyes wearily. Would my conscience never let me rest?

Yes, I kept my emotions to myself and no, I didn't smile or laugh very often; _but_, I thought irritably, _being a Potions teacher is hardly an amusing career_.

I knew that, in general, all the students (excluding those in Slytherin) disliked me to some extent. And to be completely honest, I generally disliked most of them back. It was not an easy task, teaching Potions. It meant getting up early and staying up late marking essays. It meant long hours gathering ingredients and sorting them out. It meant sweating over the steaming fumes of cauldrons and freezing slowly from the iciness of the dungeons. It ruined my skin and it left my hair lank; and to say that preventing students from blowing up the classroom was an easy feat would surely have to be the understatement of the century, especially when Longbottom was involved. At least the pay was reasonable.

The students, no doubt, payed no regard to these facts. I was well aware of the names they called me, how they referred to me as a great greasy bat. _I'd liked to see just _one_ of those evil little shits spend a week in the Potions classroom and _not_ have greasy hair, _I thought darkly.

I shook my head. There was no use thinking about my career, I told myself, it was not going to get these essays marked in any case. I picked up my quill again, and forced myself to read the wretched papers until they were done.

*~*

The day passed by incredibly slowly and I can not pretend that my patience was not waning by dinner. I spent the whole hour sitting there scowling and skulking, although as this was hardly different from my usual character, nobody noticed.

I then retired to the staff room where I enjoyed a restrained argument with Minerva over the first game of Quidditch for the year. Several hours later, having finally exhausted the subject, I decided it was late enough to return to my room and wait for Hermione. I didn't know what time she would be coming, but I wasn't about to sit around with the staff when I could be tasting her sweetness again.

But before I could make an excuse to leave, Minerva sighed and rubbed her temples, 'Severus, I'm quite tired.' She furrowed her brows, 'As much as I have enjoyed this conversation,' (I gave a small smirk), 'I hope you'll forgive me, but I think I'll turn in.' She stood up.

I gave her a look of polite surprise, 'Oh, must you? Well, it so happens that I have somewhere that I need to be anyway.' As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I wanted to kick myself. Couldn't I keep my mouth shut when it counted?

Just as I could have predicted, I heard a soft voice behind me. 'And where exactly is that Severus?' Dumbledore had overheard my conversation.

'Oh, there is a book I was supposed to borrow today from the library. It must have slipped my mind, but I really must get it now' I lied coolly, though I was cursing myself inside. Lying came easy to me, almost second nature; but Albus always had a way to see through me without the use of Legilimency.

I felt his light blue eyes pierce into mine, but I kept my face impassive as he asked, 'And you feel you must get the book tonight? It is already late, Severus.'

His persistence was making me nervous, but I kept my cool. 'I am aware, Albus. But yes, I really must get it tonight.' I stood up. 'Now, if you'll excuse me' I trailed off, hurrying towards the door.

'Wait a moment, Severus!' Minerva was calling after me. I turned. She had followed me to the door. 'I'll join you if you don't mind. I wanted to have a word with Poppy in the Infirmary before I leave.'

I nodded, wanting to slap my own forehead in frustration. My own stupid lie had cost me precious time with Hermione. Now I had no choice but to go upstairs. 'Certainly' I replied, always the gentleman.

We left the staff room together and walked up the stairs, away from the dungeons and possibly from Hermione. I wasn't sure if she was already down there, waiting for me. For a moment I pictured her there, alone, scared and slowly freezing in the cold, and my stomach turned over in fear and worry; but then I remembered that this was Hermione Granger and she would have remembered to dress warmly, not to mention that she could conjure fire at will. I very nearly smiled, but managed to turn it into a grimace. I would have to be careful of my emotions in the future, I thought.

We were halfway across the third floor landing when I decided I wanted to make small talk. 'Why did you want to see Poppy?' I asked lightly.

Minerva, as usual, gave me a small frown as we continued our brisk walk, 'Well, I wanted to ask her ab–.' She stopped talking abruptly, coming to a halt with one foot on the third floor staircase. I stopped too and looked at her enquiringly. She did not reply, but cocked her ear towards the ceiling, listening. I listened too. Sure enough, there was a faint noise coming from the fourth floor. It sounded like two people were talking, and the fact that we could hear them from the floor below meant that it was probably a very loud conversation. Indeed, it sounded like someone was shouting.

We looked slowly at each other and then simultaneously moved forwards up the stairs, drawing our wands. We ran up the staircase, the voices getting louder, and then turned the corner, where I nearly crashed into Filch who was standing at the end of the landing near the Infirmary, holding a lamp. I righted myself at the last second while Filch bellowed at someone, Mrs Norris hissing at his feet.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance while I heard Minerva sigh in exasperation beside me as we realised that the disturbance had only been Filch terrorizing some poor student caught out of bed. Usually if I came across such a situation I would just keep on walking, unless, of course, it was a Slytherin student. However, tonight I was with Minerva and anyone with half a brain could tell that Filch's attitude towards the unfortunate student was making her increasingly cross. She was, after all, already tired.

'Filch? Miss Granger? What in Merlin's name is going on here!?' she yelled. I looked up sharply. _Miss Granger?_ Moving quickly forward, I looked closely at the person standing across from Filch. It was Hermione.

After I had caught my breath, the first thing I noticed was that she was in a mess: she was standing with her legs tangled up in a cloak; her hair was wild and partly sticking up, her face alive with blazing anger. She did not look at me, but opened her mouth to speak. Filch cut her off.

'I caught her attacking Mrs Norris, Professor. She was waiting here for her, waiting to attack her. Then I caught her in the act, I did!' He pointed the lamp accusingly at Hermione.

Before I had time to register such a bizarre accusation, Hermione had fired up. 'I wasn't trying to attack her, you idiot! I was walking down the corridor when your evil cat flung itself at me and started scratching my eyes out!' she yelled defiantly in his face. I was momentarily stunned, but rather excited at the same time.

I had never seen Hermione acting so defiant before and this wild side of hers was turning me on immensely. Smirking, I thought how it would feel if this fieriness was used in the privacy of my bedroom. I wouldn't mind in the slightest if Hermione wanted to dominate me. But these pleasant thoughts were rudely interrupted by Minerva, who was yelling again, and then realisation hit me like a tonne of bricks: the only reason she had been down here in the first place was to sneak her way down to see _me_. I groaned inwardly as I listened to what Minerva was shouting about.

'–is quite enough!' she was saying, nothing but shock resounding in her voice. 'Miss Granger– no, Filch!' she shouted, as he tried to talk over her, 'Let me speak! Now, Miss Granger, I do not want to believe that you were up here specifically for the purpose of attacking Mrs Norris. So I am asking you, Miss Granger, if you were not trying to attack the cat, what exactly were you doing up here in the first place?'

Like I had assumed, Minerva obviously did not believe the idea that Hermione had sneaked all the way down here simply to put a hex on a cat, not that I would blame her, or anyone for that matter, if she did. Mrs Norris was affectionate to nobody but Filch.

I waited silently, anxious to hear what Hermione would say. Surely she wouldn't say the truth? I tried to catch her eye but she was staring resolutely at Filch.

Hermione sounded much more subdued when she spoke, though she still refused to look at me. 'I wanted to return a library book, Professor. I forgot that it was due today, so I took Harry's cloak and stole up here so I could return it. Then Mrs Norris saw me and leapt on me.' She glared at the fur ball hissing from between Filch's knobbly old legs and then turned slowly around. 'I accidentally broke this statue, too' she said quietly, pointing to it. As she patted herself down, I saw her wand lying on the floor, half covered by Potter's Invisibility Cloak.

I couldn't restrain myself. I found myself walking towards her, standing right in front of her. Slowly, I bent down and picked up her wand, holding it out to her. 'It's here' I said softly, trying my best to remain calm. Hermione looked directly at me, her eyes boring into mine and for a moment, my decency left me and I forgot about the fact that two members of staff were watching. With her so close, I wanted to reach out and touch her skin, feel its creamy softness in my hands. I felt my hand twitch, almost betraying me.

But then I looked closer at her and all these thoughts left me. Hermione had blood dribbling down her arms; tiny red lines were welling up across her face. She shivered where she stood and suddenly my lust had transfigured into pure hatred: Mrs Norris had done this. That mangy, disease-ridden, old cat had done this to _my_ Hermione. For a moment, my rage over the idea that anyone would hurt Hermione seemed to overwhelm me and I could barely see straight, but then my head cleared.

I wanted to give that cat the most exquisite pain imaginable, and I would. But revenge would have to wait. First I had to clear Hermione's name and then make sure her injuries were treated. I stepped away from Hermione carefully and looked at Minerva.

'Well Minerva, it seems clear to me exactly how we can solve this' I said coldly. Minerva merely pursed her lips tighter together. 'Really, Severus? Would you care to explain then?' It was obvious that she was a frog's whisker away from starting a yelling match and waking up half the school in the process, so I got straight to the point, praying furiously that Hermione had had the sense to follow her story through.

'Certainly' I replied softly, my anger throbbing through me gently. I stood next to Minerva and gazed down at Hermione expressionlessly. 'Miss Granger said she had to return a book. Do you have that book on you, Miss Granger?' She looked back at me, her eyes huge, and nodded slowly, holding up a book in her hands. My insides sank in relief.

Minerva looked at the book and sighed wearily. 'Well, then it's obvious that Miss Granger is speaking the truth. She must have run into Mrs Norris, who– '

'Don't say Mrs Norris attacked her!' Filch interrupted, his old face screwed up in anger.

My patience at Filch had expired. 'Argus, the girl was setting out to the library to return a book. Her wand was lying on the floor and she is covered head to toe in scratches!' I felt my anger rise up again inside, and couldn't control my voice. I started yelling. 'I hardly think that, given the evidence, Miss Granger would seek out to fight a cat in the middle of the night without her wand!' I finished abruptly, breathing heavily.

Silence fell; Filch looking at me with surprise etched across his face. I think he must have been expecting me to side with him, especially considering Hermione was in Gryffindor. Minerva laid a hand on my arm. It was enough to silence me. She turned towards Filch.

'Argus, I know you think best of your pet, but it seems in this case, that she simply sensed Miss Granger's presence and assaulted her. We cannot punish Mrs Norris for that,' she added, eyebrows raised, as Filch swelled up like a Muggle balloon, 'But you must keep her under control, otherwise the Headmaster may see to it that she can no longer stay at Hogwarts.' Filch stood quite still for a moment, knowing he had lost the battle, before picking up his spitting, hissing cat and stalking into the darkness. I was glad to see the back of him.

Minerva seemed to feel the same. Scowling deeply at Filch's retreating figure, she turned back to Hermione, rubbing her temples again. 'Miss Granger, you are well aware that it is forbidden to walk the corridors at midnight.' She looked quite fed-up. 'Frankly, I am disappointed somewhat in you, Miss Granger. You are Head Girl, and you set an example not only to other Gryffindors, but to everyone here at Hogwarts.'

Hermione hung her head in shame and I glared at Minerva, who didn't notice, but continued, 'However, I am aware that your intentions were fairly innocent.' She sighed and looked at Hermione shrewdly. 'So I am willingly to give you only one detention – tomorrow night – for this misdemeanour, rather than a week's worth, as I would have done with anyone else.' I raised my eyebrows at Minerva in what I hoped was a cold and calculating look, for I was feeling very annoyed. I had obviously put too much faith in the hope that she wouldn't reprimand Hermione because she was of her own House. I had succeeded in getting Hermione hurt twice in one day, as well as into trouble with her Head of House, and now there would be less time to spend with her. I scowled again, more angry at myself than at Minerva.

So caught up in my thoughts, I didn't realise that Hermione was speaking. 'What is it, Professor?' she asked softly, peering uncertainly into Minerva's face. I looked closely at her: she was looking into the distance and frowning harder than she had all evening. 'I just recalled that I have another detention to preside for tomorrow night. And I have a week's worth of detentions to supervise because of Lee Jordan.' She looked like she wanted nothing better than to sink onto the floor and sleep. At that moment, I felt almost sorry for her. _Almost_. I smirked.

Then suddenly, she whipped around to face me. Caught off guard, my eyes widened in surprise. 'Professor Snape, would you mind supervising Hermione's detention? I would not ask, only you are already present…' she trailed off delicately, and then I saw _her_ smirk at the look on my face.

My anger vanished. I could have hugged her. If it had been any other student, even Draco, I would have raised an objection at once. How dare you, I would have thought, _how_ _dare_ _you_ give me detentions to oversee! And, oh, how she would have found it all so amusing because I would have to comply and not make a fuss in front of the students.

But this was Hermione we were talking about! All I could think about was getting Hermione on her own again, and Minerva, in her attempt to aggravate me, was handing me the opportunity on a silver plate!

With all my strength I managed to fight the urge to laugh aloud. I obviously was even a better actor than I gave myself credit for because when I spoke, my voice was completely calm. 'Of course, Minerva.'

I turned towards Hermione, wanting to see her expression, but at the same time afraid that I might not be able to keep up this pretence much longer if I did. 'I am free tomorrow night. Miss Granger, you will meet me in my office for your deten– Miss Granger, what's wrong?' I moved quickly forwards towards Hermione, who had started to sway. After having her faint early in the day, I wasn't taking any chances.

Before I reached her, she started to fall backwards. _No!_ I thought. Thankfully, she managed to right herself, holding onto the statue. She seemed to be trying to pull herself together but dropped her wand. Slowly, she touched the back of her neck. _What is she doing?_ I wondered. She took her hand back and looked at it blankly. I instantly recognised the shiny red liquid. Blood.

'She's bleeding! Quickly, Minerva!' I yelled, running forward. For the second time that day I caught Hermione before her head hit the ground, though this time I used my wand instead of my hands to lift her. I looked at her as closely as I dared. Hermione's face had at least a dozen tiny scratches over it. Dried blood covered her bare arms. I turned her lolling head gently. She was barely conscious. 'It's okay Hermione, everything will be okay' I murmured gently. Could she hear me? I restrained myself from stroking her hair. I wanted to comfort her, but how could I do that with Minerva around? I continued to check over Hermione. The back of her neck was deeply grazed, the skin purple like a bruise. The rage I had experienced earlier came back. _That cat will pay_, I thought darkly. But for now, Hermione needed medical help.

'I'll get Poppy' Minerva said suddenly, waking me from my thoughts. I nodded curtly, and picked up Potter's cloak as Hermione drifted into the Infirmary. _Thank Merlin it was so close_, I thought gratefully and followed Minerva through the door.


	11. Chapter 11

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, just the silly plot

**Author's Note**: Hello chappies! Im baaaack! yes ive been gone for a year but im here to finish this story!! And I have some ideas too! Please R&R

**A Yearning - Chapter 11**

_Hermione – _

For the second time in less than 24 hours, I woke up to find myself lying on a bed that was not my own. My head was aching worse than it had ever done so in my life.

If it was possible I would have tried to move, to see where exactly I was; but I couldn't seem to sit up or even move my head. Because of this, I could only look in one direction: up. Looking only at the ceiling would not have been very useful; however, if I had not been there enough times at Hogwarts to easily recognise where I was – the Infirmary.

It was daytime, and I could see sunlight streaming in, filling the room with white light. I shut my eyes in disgust. In normal circumstances I would have been glad of some sunlight, but it was _not_ helping my headache. Thankfully, I found my arms were in full working order, and pressed my hands against my head which felt ten times bigger than normal.

I groaned, trying to get someone's attention without having to talk; thinking that noise would only worsen my pains. As this didn't seem to work, I succumbed to using my voice only to find that my jaw had been tightly bound shut with bandages. _Great_, I thought bitterly. _So how on earth do I get someone's damn attention to close the fucking curtains when I can't move or talk!_

I lay there angrily for some time, unable to do or say anything as my head continued to throb madly. _God, even when I fainted in Severus' office it didn't feel anything as bad as this!_ I thought after some time, and then all the last night's events came flooding back to me. I lay there silently (well, what else could I do?) and thought over it all for awhile, wondering what Severus thought about it, and what he would have to say to me when we found a chance to meet.

I had just come to the conclusion that serious revenge would have to be taken on Mrs Norris, and having concocted – as well as I could with my swollen head – a plan where I could kill her in such a way that no one could possibly blame me; I was trying to think of a suitable alibi, when a shadow suddenly appeared over my bed and a loud shrill voice rang in my ears: 'Awake then, Miss Granger? Well it's high time, I should think. I thought you were going to sleep the whole day away!' It was Madam Pomfrey.

I winced at her voice. It was like stabbing a knife into my ear and then twisting it deeper. My hands, which had until then, been covering my eyes from the light, now transferred to block the hideous voice that poured into my brain. I half-expected blood to be dripping out of my ears.

Madam Pomfrey was still chatting, obviously unaware of my agony, but I wasn't paying any attention to the task of distinguishing the sounds. Suddenly, hands gripped over mine, wrenching them away from my ears. 'Hold still, Miss Granger! How do you expect me to take off the bandages otherwise?' I grudgingly allowed her to take them off, as it seemed to make her stop talking in any case.

Finally, my jaw was set free as Madam Pomfrey unwound the long bandage from my head and neck, but just as I had opened my mouth to tell her, nicely of course, that my head was aching and could she keep her voice down; when she turned back to face me and shoved a large spoonful of potion into my open mouth.

Spluttering, I swallowed the liquid while Madam Pomfrey watched pointedly, her expression showing mild amusement. Instantly, my head pain lessened. I gasped, moving my head from side to side, feeling the back of my neck. There was only a light bump there to remind me of what had happened in my tangle with Mrs Norris. Madam Pomfrey was still talking. Her voice wasn't making my head pound quite as much as before, but it still hurt to hear – it sounded shrill in my ears. I looked back at Madam Pomfrey, wincing slightly as I massaged my jaw.

'That potion you just took should keep the head pain away for a while' she informed me, loudly. 'But you'll have to stay here until Monday morning just in case. The potion you took last night, _after_ you collapsed my dear' she added when I gave her a puzzled look, 'Yes, that potion does have a tendency to produce aggressiveness, hot-headedness and such. So _this_ potion,' she indicated the spoon she had just shoved into my mouth,' should counteract that nicely. And now go eat your breakfast before it gets cold! Goodness me–' she seemed to be talking to herself rather than to me, 'What is it with people not wanting to take care of themselves. First Severus is up here all night, and–'

'Sev– erm, Professor Snape was here all night?' I interrupted her rambling at the hearing of this piece of information. She turned to me in surprise. 'Yes! I told him to get some rest, but he refused! Said he needed to watch over you…' She shook her head and bustled away.

I snuggled into my bed. Severus had stayed here all night to look after me! I felt my eagerness to see him double inside me. I started to eat my toast, thinking carefully as I chewed. Twice in one day, he had managed to prevent any serious injuries from occurring to me. If ever I had had any doubts about him, they now disappeared. It seemed fairly plain to me that he cared for me. And the kiss we had shared yesterday (my stomach did a flip) definitely illustrated what he wanted from me. I smiled to myself, thinking how eager I was to give him that gift.

*~*

After breakfast, I settled down in my bed; ready to begin a day of total and complete boredom. I knew the news that I was in the hospital wing would have already spread throughout the castle, but I gave up any hope that anyone would come and visit me. Madam Pomfrey had spent the last hour telling everyone that showed up that my head was still too delicate for conversation and so I wasn't allowed to have visitors. Whatever she said about the medicine reducing my _hot-headedness_, I was still infuriated, not only because I really wanted to apologize to Harry, but because she wouldn't allow me to do _anything_ else either! After having an argument with her over being allowed to read The Daily Prophet; Madam Pomfrey finally yanked the paper out of my hands.

'But why can't I read it!' I said, almost ready to cry.

'_Because,_ your head is still delicate!' Madam Pomfrey cried exasperatedly, taking out the medicine bottle again.

'My head is perfectly fine! It's my neck that was damaged!' I nearly shouted back.

Madam Pomfrey gave me a glare as she shook the bottle. 'Look Miss Granger, I don't have a problem with you reading! But I have strict orders that you are to do nothing that might aggravate the pain! So please stop hassling me!'

I glared right on back. 'Well whoever gave you these "_strict orders_" must be a complete and utter dolt! _You_ know there's nothing wrong with my head! Who told you this anyway?' I yelled.

Madam Pomfrey had opened her mouth to yell back, but a deep voice interrupted. '_I_ gave those orders, _Miss Granger_.'

I turned my head to the sound of the voice, knowing who it was before I even had to look. Severus was standing in the doorway of the Infirmary, staring at me with such intensity that I should have blushed, but I was in a rotten mood so I glared and said nothing. He walked over to Madam Pomfrey, who was still breathing heavily from our argument. 'Poppy, I think you could do with some air. Why not go outside for a while? I'll make sure Miss Granger gets her medicine and calms down. I promise you that she'll be perfectly soothed by the time you get back. Go on,' he urged, as Madam Pomfrey hesitated, 'take an hour off. I'll call you if anyone else shows up for treatment.' He said it with such confidence that she took one look at me, huffed, practically threw the medicine bottle and spoon into Severus' hands and stalked out of the room, the door banging shut behind her.

Severus and I were now alone in the room. He walked over to my bed. 'How are you, Miss Granger?' He sounded amused.

I was not in the mood for games. 'In pain, thank you!' I spat.

Strangely, he gave me a sly smile. 'Well let's see what I can do to fix that' he murmured, and unscrewed the medicine bottle in his hands. Silently, I watched him pour out a spoonful of the medicine. Putting the bottle on the bedside cabinet, he leaned towards me and held out the spoon to my mouth.

'Open up, Miss Granger' he said softly, smirking. I must have forgotten what his voice could do to me. The hairs on the back of my neck rose, but my anger flared up instantly. _Does he think he can make fun of me?_ I opened my mouth, glowering at him, but did not resist as he slowly slid the spoon in. I clamped my mouth around it and let him draw it out again. He put the spoon down on the bedside table and sat watching me, smirking still.

'Stop that!' I said sharply. He looked at me appraisingly. 'Stop what?' he asked, still smug.

'Stop smirking at me like that!' Suddenly, I was furious at him. Severus' smirk vanished. 'None of this is particularly funny, you know! First I get attacked by that evil cat, and now you won't let me even read the goddamn paper! _Why?_' I cried, glaring at him.

Severus frowned. 'Hermione, be _quiet_!' he hissed angrily, leaning forward close to my face. It seemed to do the trick: I couldn't say a word, numbed by the fierceness of his gaze. My anger seemed to shrink a little. He seemed to sense it, and immediately changed his tone.

'Hermione,' he whispered, his face inches from mine, 'You must understand that if people hear you yelling, they'll come running in. They'll see me, and they'll think the worst.' He paused, and looked away from me. I waited for him to continue.

He looked back at me and, reaching out, gently touched a curly lock of my hair. 'I told Madam Pomfrey that you were not to have visitors purely because I knew it was the only way I could spend some time alone here with you,' he explained softly. He fell silent again, but this time I didn't wait for him to speak.

'Oh, well I suppose that makes up for everything doesn't it!' I fumed quietly. 'Having a cat try to gouge my eyes out and getting into trouble and having a detention–.'

'That detention will be spent with _me_, as you well know. I would have thought you might have found that idea intriguing. It certainly gives me ideas' Severus interrupted silkily, a smirk back on his lips.

I tried to sound angry, but my resolve was washing away. 'Lucky me' I said, as dryly as I could.

Far from removing his smug expression, his smile widened. 'You're quite the feisty one lately' he said. His amusement could not have been made any plainer. I didn't smile back.

'Well you would be too if a cat leapt on you for no reason and started clawing your face off!' I snapped back.

Severus sat down on the side of the bed. I folded my arms to stop myself from wrapping them around him. He leaned in close to me. 'I like you when you're like this' he whispered seductively, a smile on his face.

My determination to remain angry with him was rapidly diminishing. I glared as hard as I could. 'So I suppose you'll be planning more cat attacks for me, then?'

He gave me a quick grin and reached out to touch my face. I didn't stop him. He gazed at me for a while and then sighed. 'I'm sorry. I've got you hurt twice in one day.' He looked suddenly so unhappy that I found myself softening.

'Well, it wasn't your fault. Mrs Norris is the one who attacked me' I soothed.

Severus didn't answer, but gently massaged the back of my head where I had cut my head. 'How does your head feel?' he asked.

'Painful. But it's not so bad when I've taken the medicine.' I winced as he fingers brushed against the lump. Severus noticed and immediately took his hand away. Suddenly he seemed almost scared to touch me, as though he might get burnt.

I couldn't stop myself from laughing. 'It only hurts when you touch the lump.'

Slowly, he slid one hand up around my waist and leaned even closer to me, our noses almost touching. His other hand snaked its way up my legs. His urge to touch me gave me an even stronger urge to touch him back. Sitting up straight, I wrapped my arms around his neck, his shoulders. Leaning in to him, I kissed him.

It was like yesterday, only better…and longer. Having already investigated each other before, we took turns to explore each other with our tongues, and broke off the long passionate kisses with smaller, sweeter ones. We wrapped our arms around each other at first, but then began to touch elsewhere. Severus suddenly slid one of his arms from around my waist up to my midriff. Slowly, he snaked his hand up and up until it rested on my left breast. Without a single pause, he began to stroke it in slow circles through my hospital gown, until I felt my nipple harden. I couldn't help but moan into his mouth as he now began to stroke my other breast with his free hand, massaging slowly in a sensual rhythm. His touches were making my increasingly hotter in certain areas and I was beginning to wonder how much of this he was aware of when he suddenly pulled away from me.

I looked instinctively to the door to see if someone had walked in, but the door was still shut. I stared at Severus. He was looking at me with a flushed, animated expression. I couldn't ever remember a time that I had seen him looking so excited. 'What is it?' I breathed.

Severus continued to look at me closely, and breathing heavily like he had just run a long distance. 'What is it?' I repeated, realising that I was breathing just as heavily.

With one hand, he silently raised my chin and gazed into my eyes, and with the other, held onto my upper arm, caressing my skin with his thumb; and looked at me up and down. His expression was greedy; it looked for all the world as though I was a gourmet banquet feast and he was starving, desperate to devour me.

I realised instantly what he wanted, and began to panic silently. Not only was I fearing that I wouldn't be up to his expectations, but I was terrified of the idea that someone might catch us, and as we were in the hospital wing, this didn't seem too unlikely.

Severus seemed to have no idea of my discomfort. As I opened my mouth to protest to him, he raised a finger to my lips, demanding silence. I obeyed instantly; my ability to remain in control of myself when he was so close seemed to disappear.

Gently, he slipped his hands around the back of my neck and lowered my head back onto the bed. Now lying down, I watched with apprehension as he re-positioned himself slightly on the edge of the bed. I was confused, thinking that perhaps I had misjudged his intention. _What on earth was he going to do then, if he stayed sitting?_ I soon found out.

With one finger still on my lips, he flicked his wand and the curtains around the bed immediately sprung up around us. Another flick and I heard the lock click in the Infirmary door. I began to feel like I was a trapped animal, but I thought to myself calmly that I could trust Severus, and that nothing terrible would happen. Still, I couldn't help but breathe more heavily and he must have noticed because some of the greed on his face seemed to disappear, and gave me a small smile. 'Just relax. I promise you that you'll enjoy this' he purred. His voice made my skin prickle again, and my heartbeat started to race.

Severus didn't wait any longer, and after one more brief glance at my face, turned his attention to below my midriff. I was only wearing a borrowed nightdress that Madam Pomfrey must have put on me the night before, and he seemed to quickly realise this as he snaked his hands up my legs and found only my panties between himself and me. He didn't look at my face as I allowed him to slide them off, his attention completely transfixed by my anatomy; but I watched his every move, every expression.

He didn't waste any time removing my panties, didn't waste a moment lingering on them. Pushing the top of the night dress up I saw his eyes twinkle as he saw what he was looking for, and without a moment's hesitation, started to rub and massage between my thighs with his fingers.

I now understood why he had warned me to be silent. The intense pleasure I felt as he rubbed and stroked was so exquisite that I started moaning instantly.

'_Shh_' he murmured close to my ear. I bit my lip to quiet myself but nearly gasped as he slid a finger in. I closed my eyes and gave myself up to the bliss, trying without much success to keep silent.

I have no idea how long we stayed like that, but I felt him slide another finger in between my legs, and then another. The heat was building up inside me, threatening to overwhelm me and then–

'Severus? Severus! What's going on? Severus, open this door!'

Madam Pomfrey was banging on the door, frantically wringing the door knob. My eyes flew open in surprise. I looked at Severus – he was looking directly at me, frowning slightly. I could tell he was thinking carefully. I had opened my mouth to ask him what I should do when he smiled down at me.

Silently, he bent over and picked up my panties and helped me put them back on. Then hastily flipping the bed covers over me, he gave me a quick kiss and ripped open the bed curtains.

Striding towards the door, which Madam Pomfrey was still hammering on, Severus deftly unlocked it and opened it, making her lurch forward in surprise.

'What is the meaning of all this racket?' he yelled, 'Don't you know this is an Infir– oh, Poppy, it's you!' Severus lied convincingly. I nearly smiled, but caught myself and tried to look as surprised as Severus was.

Madam Pomfrey righted herself, her face red from yelling. 'Severus, I have been trying to get through this door for five minutes! Didn't you hear me calling you? Why have you locked this door?' she cried furiously.

Severus frowned down at her like she was one of his students. 'I was in the back room checking up on the potion supply. I thought you might have thanked me for that. In any case, the door was not locked,' he stopped, looking smug, 'but perhaps it was stuck.' He turned around to face me and grinned, as Madam Pomfrey couldn't see his face from behind. I wanted to smile back but knew I had to play my part too.

'What's going on?' I asked innocently, pretending to wipe sleep from my eyes. 'I heard banging sounds. Is everything okay?' I widened my eyes and gazed at Madam Pomfrey.

She simply glared at Severus suspiciously. 'Nothing is the matter, Miss Granger.' She strode over to me and checked the back of my head. 'You'll be discharged tonight. Severus, there is no need for you to stay. I have everything under control,' she added curtly.

Severus nodded. 'Very well. Miss Granger, your detention will be tomorrow night at eight thirty down in my office. Do not be late.' To my disappointment, he did not linger, but left straight away.

I sighed deeply and laid my head carefully back on the pillows. Closing my eyes again, I smiled as I thought how many hours it would be until I saw Severus again. Excitement bubbled as I wondered lustily what he would have in store for me.


	12. Chapter 12

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**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of these characters, you know the rest!

**Author's Note**: Here's a new chapter. Its a little snippet of something that might just ruin everything for Sev and Hermy *snickers* Please R&R :)

**A Yearning - Chapter 12**

_Dumbledore –_

I watched carefully as Severus ascended the stairs with Minerva. The glow of the fireplace in the staff room reflected off the metallic band that encircled Minerva's hat.

Was he hiding something? That flicker of unease had seemed far too apparent when I had questioned Severus' activities. What had he said?

''_Oh, there is a book I was supposed to borrow today from the library. It must have slipped my mind, but I really must get it now''_

Hmmmm…..

Something was off here.

*~*

I bumped, quite literally into Severus just the next day, outside the Infirmary.

'My goodness, Severus. I wouldn't have expected to see you up here. This is the fourth floor!'

Severus gave me a withering look. 'I do venture upstairs Headmaster….when the time permits.'

I smiled. 'And on such a lovely day?'

He gave a very thin smile. 'Unfortunately so. I must enquire about a…detention.'

Was there a hesitation?

'Surely not a _Slytherin_, Severus?'

'Oh no. No. Miss Granger.'

'Ah.'

We stood there for a moment, until I sensed the silence was a sufficiently awkward.

'Well, I shall be off, Severus.'

'Yes, Headmaster.' He turned to go.

'Oh, Severus!' He turned back somewhat impatiently.

'Yes, Albus?' His tone suggested politeness. Severus was rarely polite.

'Did you find that book?'

'Book?'

_Ahhh._

He shook his head slowly.

'No. Someone had borrowed it.'

'Then I suppose you'll just have to get it another time?'

He hesitated. 'Yes.'

I nodded and turned away.


	13. Chapter 13

_**Disclaimer**: Sadly I own none of these characters._

_**A/N**: Uh..oh.... R&R pleeeeease!_

_**Chapter 13**_

_Severus_ –

I lay Hermione down gently onto the Infirmary bed and then took a seat next to her motionless body.

After waving off her attempts to help, Minerva wearily retreated to the Infirmary office, where she relayed the night's events to a wide-eyed Poppy. Sitting alone with Hermione in the gloom, I whispered spells, half-holding my breath as I watched the scratches seal up and disappear.

It was the second time in less than 24 hours that Hermione was lying on a bed recovering from a faint. The scratches had healed and her neck would mend, but would Hermione forgive me again? I pondered this sadly. It didn't seem likely to me that she would. Certainly, I wouldn't blame her if she never spoke to me again. She might even turn me in to Albus. I felt my body sag in despair.

Albus. I suspected that he suspected. We both smelled a rat. Meanwhile, the voice in my head tried desperately to convince me that everything would be alright.

*~*

Later the next day I was striding out of the Infirmary, smirking at everything I saw. The day's events had flipped my mood upside down. Not only had Hermione been understanding, she'd been _giving_.

I had to force myself to remain composed although I actually could have danced down the corridors. _Now is not the time to go around grinning at everyone. That would only give you away._

I knew that now was the time for me to take control of the situation. Hermione had a detention booked with me for tomorrow night. For the first time in so many years, I felt…happy.

That was until I saw Dumbledore and Minerva walking straight towards me. It was clear they were after me, and they weren't smiling. My stomach plummeted like a stone dropped in a cauldron.

'Severus,' Albus began. 'Might we have a talk in your office?' Minerva was standing there next to him, looking as flustered as I felt. She obviously didn't know what this was about. I pretended I didn't either, on the off chance that I was over-reacting. After all, how could they possibly guess?

'Headmaster? Is there something wrong?' I procrastinated.

'There might be. It depends,' Albus replied lightly. His light blue eyes were like glass.

'On what?' I asked, feigning impatience.

'On what you have to say.'

I didn't trust myself to answer that so I nodded swiftly, and without a backward glance at Minerva's surprised face I turned away sharply and headed down to the dungeons.


	14. Chapter 14

_Disclaimer: _Once again, I dont own these characters

_A/N_: Sorry guys. This is just a filler chapter. It's not very interesting but it had to be done. Otherwise we'd have weird blanks all over the place! **PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take the time to review. it only takes 30 seconds. I know there were at least 100 reads of this story this week, yet only one kind soul reviewed! The rest of you - if you want to read more, cut the slack! Reading reviews, even bad ones, makes me feel happy about this story and without them I won't want to continue writing it.**

**Chapter 14**

_Hermione_ –

'Look Harry. I really can't explain it to you right now. I'm sorry. I'm just really sorry!'

My pleas for forgiveness were falling somewhat on deaf ears. Harry and Ron stood next to me in the Infirmary. Severus had barely left the room when my friends had scampered in to see me. Harry was clutching his head in attempt to understand whilst Ron collapsed into the chair next to the bed.

'But just tell me why? Why did you even _need_ to go to the library? What you said last night – it didn't even make sense!'

I pursed my lips, trying to look annoyed. I was actually panicking. I knew perfectly well that there was absolutely no reasonable excuse for my actions last night. I had taken Harry's Invisibility Cloak with the vague excuse that I had to return an overdue book. Of course, I had asked him first….sort of.

'I was half asleep, Hermione! And if anyone would be understanding with you about returning an overdue book it would Miss Pince. Right Ron?' He turned for emotional support.

'Huh? Oh, yeah! Definitely! I mean you practically live in the library as it is. Now look where it got you.' Ron shook his head wearily, as if going to the library every day was _wrong_.

I scrambled to find a defence, anything that would stop my friends from becoming suspicious. I found nothing.

'I'm really, _really_ sorry, Harry.' I said lamely. 'Really sorry. I _promise_ it won't happen again.'

Harry sighed. 'It's fine Hermione. Anyway, we have to tell you something. We saw-.'

At that moment, Madam Pomfrey bustled over with the medicine bottle again. Elbowing Ron in the face, she poured an enormous spoonful out and thrust it into my hand before stomping away.

I smirked to myself as Ron grumbled loudly, and swallowed the medicine.

'Ouch! That bloody hurt! _What_ is her problem today Hermione? Did you do something?'

I tried not to laugh as her office door shut louder than usual. 'Umm. No, I really haven't the slightest idea,' I lied. I felt that this was distracting us from something and then remembered. 'Sorry Harry. What were you saying?'

Harry looked around in his conspiratorial kind of way and then leaned forward. 'We saw Dumbledore and McGonagall talking to Snape outside.'

My body went cold at hearing his name and my heart started beating faster. It brought my mind back quickly to what we had been doing in this very room barely an hour earlier.

'Yes?' I tried to be casual. 'So what were they talking about?'

Ron twirled his wand idly in his fingers. 'Dumbledore wanted to speak to him _in_ _private_.' He smirked. 'Snape didn't look too happy.'

My insides sagged. Uh oh. What did this mean? 'Did he say what it was about?'

Harry shook his head. 'We were just walking in to see you, but I heard Snape ask if there was something wrong. Dumbledore just looked at him and said that it depended on what he had to say.'

'Did Dumbledore look angry?'

'Furious, more like,' said Ron. 'I hope Snape gets the sack.' My friends grinned at each other.

I felt like my world was ripping at the seams. 'No! No, there's no way Dumbledore would do that! I can't happen!'

Ron gave me a weird look. 'Since when have you been Snape's biggest fan? Didn't he give you shit just the other day? He yelled at you in class for Merlin's sake! Don't tell me you're actually upset about this!'

I shook my head. Nothing was making sense. I tried to stay calm. 'But neither of you actually heard Dumbledore say anything about being fired, did you? You don't know what it was about. It could have been the Order. Or maybe it was just something personal to do with Dumbledore. They _are_ very close.'

Harry shook his head. 'Trust us Hermione. Dumbledore looked mad. Really angry. There's that look in his eyes…'

I closed my eyes tightly, afraid of what I was hearing. Why was Dumbledore mad at Severus? It was something that I knew I would need to ask him about as soon as possible. Not for the last time, I was frustrated at the enormous bandage around my neck. It would be hours before I could speak to him. There was nothing I could do but wait til tonight.

'Hermione? What's wrong?' I opened my eyes to find Ron's long nose inches from my face. He looked worried. 'If your neck is hurting can you wait until we leave before you call Madam Pomfrey? It really hurt when she whacked me in the face.'


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: **Hello everyone! Guess what? I'M BACK!! YAY!! Which means that this story is no longer on hiatus. I should be updating every week or so, but please take the time to review and keep me up to date with your thoughts. Cheers._

**Chapter 15**

_Severus_ –

'What's happened, Albus?'

I was just sitting down in the chair behind my desk. Minerva and Albus were sitting opposite in the chairs reserved for visitors or hapless students, yet somehow I felt it was clear that the interrogation was centred on me.

Dumbledore was staring right through me with those clear blue eyes. I forced myself not to look away, and blinked calmly. I still wasn't one hundred percent sure why this meeting had come about – the Order _never_ met at Hogwarts – but I had one clear inkling. I just hoped I was wrong.

Albus sat with his fingers pressed lightly together; but Minerva was rigid in her chair, rapt with attention. I leaned forward mildly, waiting for him to speak. The silence deepened around us, and I waited – pretending to be concerned when I really _was_ concerned.

Finally, Albus opened his mouth. 'There is something that has come to my attention, Severus.' He paused. For the first time in my life, Albus seemed hesitant.

'Yes?' My voice was calm but my heart was racing. I forced myself not to think about Hermione. The simplest lapse in concentration could convey every secret to Albus. I forced myself not to think about her on the hospital bed, my hands on her skin, the sound she made when we tou–.

'Severus.' Albus' voice brought me back to the room. I blinked. He still looked hesitant. 'Is there anything you would like to tell me about? Anything at all?' He watched me closely as I tried not to fumble.

'Sorry, Headmaster?' I feigned confusion. Dumbledore sighed and turned to Minerva. They exchanged a glance. Wordlessly, Minerva abruptly stood up and left the room.

'I forgot, Severus, how good an actor you are,' Albus said quietly as Minerva shut the door behind her.

I raised an eyebrow. 'I'm sorry, Albus. I still have no idea what you're talking about.'

'Yes, you do,' Albus countered calmly. He leaned back in his chair but didn't smile. 'Where were you really going last night? Do _not_ tell me it was to the library!'

My heart was pounding; thudding horribly against my ribs. 'Albus, I don't know what you mean. Last night, Minerva and I were both walking to the library when we found Miss Granger er…being attacked by Mrs Norris.'

Albus peered at me. 'You walked to the library with Minerva?'

'Yes!'

'You walked to the library _because_ you were with Minerva.'

Was that a question? I hesitated and Albus nodded. He leaned forward. 'Where were you really planning to do last night, Severus? I have known you nearly all your life. You are not one to take midnight strolls to the library.' He paused. 'Nor is Miss Granger, for that matter…'

Suddenly, Albus was standing with his wand in his hand. It wasn't pointed at me, but you didn't need Albus to point a wand at you to feel threatened.

'Albus!' I was surprised at this sudden change.

'I will only ask you this once, Severus! Only _once_.' His tone could have parted seas. 'Have you done anything, absolutely anything to threaten the life or health of a student in this school? Tell me, and tell me _now_.'

What was he asking me? If I had done any student harm? Was he really talking about Hermione? The thought of anyone hurting her made me shake in rage. I stood up, seething.

'What are you saying? Do you think I would – that I _could_ do something like that?'

'We both know what you are capable of, Severus.'

And then the images sprouted in my mind like they had been waiting for this chance. All those memories from the Death Eater days. _No_. People screaming. Houses on fire. _Stop_. People running. Laughter. Bodies. _NO_!

There was a loud bang and an explosion. My chair was a crater in the ground. 'I'm not that person anymore, Albus!' I was so angry I could barely see straight.

There was silence. Albus flicked his wand and the destroyed remains of my furniture disappeared.

'I'm sorry,' was all he said. But he didn't seem satisfied. There was more silence.

'You're still hiding something, Severus.'

'A man's allowed to have secrets,' I snapped.

I could tell Albus wanted to say something but didn't want to risk me setting fire to the desk.

'Is it…illegal?' He ventured.

I glared at him viciously. He stared back calmly. Finally, I gave in – sort of.

'Look, Albus. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm not punishing someone, or making anyone miserable. I'm certainly not doing anything _illegal_. And I'm _not_ going to tell you about it.'

I was thoroughly angry about this conversation by now. Striding around my desk, I walked past Albus and out the door; taking care to slam it as hard as I could.

**Yes, I know this was a short chappie, but it's better than nothing, right? Review please!**


	16. Chapter 16

_**A/N: **Hey, here's another update. Thanks to the people who are continuing to review. I think my chapters are becoming suspiciously short, but I promise that either the next chapter or the one after will be a LOT longer. Until then...._

_**Chapter 16**_

_Hermione_ –

I was free. But I didn't feel it.

I walked out of the Infirmary alone, Madam Pomfrey slamming the door behind me. I guessed she was still pretty miffed but it _had_ been her fault.

It didn't matter. Once upon a time having a teacher or staff member mad at me for even the slightest reason would have made me upset for days. Things were different right now. I had bigger problems. Severus was in trouble with Dumbledore about something.

It seemed unreasonable, _absurd_ even, that it could have anything to do with me. We'd only revealed our feelings to each other less than two days ago. It was also pretty clear to both of us that this was something we'd have to keep hidden; at least for now. There was no way either of us would say anything. It was ridiculous. Impossible.

So why did I have the feeling that Dumbledore knew?

I reached the end of the corridor and slid through the hidden passageway behind the bust of Skargdl the Sensitive that led up to the seventh floor. I found myself automatically rescheduling my day. There'd been four classes today and I'd missed them all, but I had tonight to catch up. Severus and I had agreed not to meet before tomorrow's scheduled detention.

_Oh, Severus._ Thinking about him made me smile and gave me butterflies. But the gnawing worry in my chest caught my breath. I realised the feeling was exactly like standing next to Neville's cauldron in Potions. Even when things started to look like they were working and the potion had turned the right colour it would suddenly go horribly wrong. The liquid might catch on fire, or give off deadly fumes, but most often it simply exploded and left everyone dazed and covered in muck.

Why did I feel like that was exactly what was going to happen to Severus and me?

'Poppy seed.' The Fat Lady portrait swung forward and I walked into the Gryffindor Common Room. Being quite early in the evening still, it was pretty packed; but I managed to spot Ron and Harry.

'Hi,' I said shortly and swung my school bag onto the table. I was grateful that they had saved me a seat, which I plonked into wearily.

'So, you're all fixed now?' Ron looked slightly worried, although that was probably because he'd just realised he'd been written a concluding paragraph about the uses of Gillyweed on his Transfiguration essay.

I rolled my eyes as he hastily copied it onto the write paper. 'Yes, my neck's fine now. There'll be a bit of bruising though.'

'I thought Madam Pomfrey could fix that sort of thing?' Harry asked, peering at the back of my neck.

I took out a fresh roll of parchment and started writing an introduction for Professor Binns' essay on thirteenth century troll wars. 'Yes, I expect she could if she wanted to,' I replied sourly.

We worked in silence until the crowd started to thin. I checked the time. Ten o'clock. The Common Room had only a handful of people left. Ron was yawning.

'Could you check this for me 'Mione? I think it's alright now that I added that last bit on uses in cosmetics.'

He slid over the paper. 'Cosmetics?'

'Yeah, you know. The things you eat.' Harry looked up from his paper wearily.

'Consumption, mate. Uses in consumption.'

'That's it.'

I checked Ron's paper blearily. Was Ron's yawning contagious? I was so tired.

I finished checking. It was pretty good. 'It's fine, Ron. Actually, it's quite good. I didn't realise you knew so much about Gillyweed.'

Ron tried to look hurt and failed miserably. 'That would be right! Everyone expects me to know nothing, I don't even know why I bother to hang around sometimes.'

Harry and I exchanged looks. 'Do I need to remind you who just finished checking your work?'

Ron grinned sheepishly. 'Alright! Fine. The truth is, well, I may have had a little help. From Luna. She knows a lot about Gillyweed.'

Harry snorted and shook his head over the books piled around him. 'Well, that figures.'

I yawned again and stood up. 'Okay, well I'm going up to bed now guys. It's been a bloody long day. I just wish I could have finished this History of Magic paper tonight! I've already missed today's class and I won't have any time to finish it tomorrow night.'

Harry and Ron stared at me. Oops. Being tired had let down my guard.

'Why not? Are you going somewhere?'

There was silence as I awkwardly tried to think of a convincing lie. But I had never been good at lying.

'Umm…I have a detention.' The last word was a whisper. The boys stared at me with their mouths open. It was too funny, I started to laugh.

'Oh, please. It's not that big of a deal.'

'Not a big deal? Hermione! You have a detention!' That was Ron.

'Yes.'

'You never get detention! You're a goody-goody!'

I ignored the last comment. 'Well tomorrow night I have a detention.'

'What _for_?' This was Harry.

'Well, sneaking around the school at night _is_ against school rules, Harry. At least, McGonagall thinks so.'

'You were attacked by a cat!'

'Wait a sec,' said Ron slowly. 'Lee Jordan has a detention tomorrow night with McGonagall. She isn't having you both in detention together, is she?'

'How do you know that?' Harry asked curiously. Ron shrugged. 'I just know,' he said. Then he looked at me.

'_Well_…I'm not actually having it with _her_.' I said slowly, like I was easing a bandaid off a wound. Harry and Ron waited patiently. I sighed. You couldn't ease off a bandaid. You had to rip it off as quickly as you could.

'I'm having the detention with Professor Snape.' It came out all in one breath.

Harry and Ron looked horrified but I wasn't interested in hearing anything else they had to say about Severus.

'Look, I'm really tired. I'm going straight to bed. Good night!' I turned and hurried up the stairs as quickly as I could without looking completely suspicious.

When I did finally climb into bed, I could feel the longing for Severus creep into me. I didn't want to wait for tomorrow night. Yet….I also felt something else. That faint feeling of fear was crawling inside me and I didn't know why. Rolling over, I told myself that it was only because I hadn't started my Ancient Runes paper yet.

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	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N: **Umm..hello again! I feel a little strange posting two chapters like this in the same night. For one thing, it's way past my bed time. But I'm on a roll now so I couldn't stop :) Sorry, if you find spelling mistakes, but I'm bloody tired. I also just realised that the next chapter might be just as short as this one so don't be too disappointed. I don't want to have too many Dumbledore POV chapters but its necessary at this point so just trust me on this. _

**Chapter 17**

_Dumbledore_ –

I was back sitting in my own office, the candlelight falling in soft curves around the room. Above me, the portraits of past staff members snored gently. Fawkes had died only yesterday, and his scrawny re-born beak was still poking out of the ashes. I stared as his glittering black eyes and they reminded me of who I had spoken with today.

The meeting hadn't gone as I expected it to. But things rarely did when they involved Severus.

What was he hiding?

There was no use trying to get into his head. He was far too prepared for that. I could feel it shutting itself down as soon as we had sat down.

It felt strange. I hadn't felt this kind of distrust in Severus since all those years ago when he agreed to spy against the Death Eaters. But, no….this was different. Back then, I had known what he could do and what he had done before. I knew what to watch for. Now, I sensed it was something quite different. He seemed anxious, worried. Worry was something that only happened to people who cared.

What was it that Severus cared so much about? Minerva had mentioned earlier the way Severus had argued with Argus on behalf of Miss Granger. It was most uncharacteristic of him.

Was that what this was really about? Miss Granger? Had they been secretly trying to meet? I tried to think of a reasonable explanation for this other than the very obvious one that was staring down my nose. Because I knew it couldn't be _that_. It would be anything but _that_.

I hated this feeling. It was a betrayal. Severus had long ago ceased to be a colleague. We were friends, although he was never one to voice things like friendship aloud. So I felt a deep pang of self-disgust as I thought through the options:

I could lie to myself, I reasoned. I could lie and pretend that I didn't have any further suspicions. As a friend, I was very tempted to do this.

I sighed deeply and listened to the snoring over my head. As with many occasions, I considered what the Headmasters and Headmistresses around me would do. I realised with dread that this was simply out of my hands. I was Headmaster of Hogwarts. It was my responsibility to ensure that everyone was doing the right thing, or in any case, not doing the _wrong_ thing. There could be something very serious happening that I should be made aware.

My mind was made up, but it was not a very happy mind. However, if there was something going on between Severus and Miss Granger I would have to find out.

Taking a quill and a scrap of parchment, I made a note for myself from what Minerva had told me. These days, my short term memory was relapsing almost daily. The scrawled note said:

_Detention – Severus and Miss Granger, 8:30pm. Remember to not be seen._

**_Dun dun DUUUN!!! Give me your thoughts people and review!_**


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N:** _SORRY! I have been so busy it's not funny so I havent had a time to write anything. Filler chapters like this are really tough for me to write in any case so please find it in your hearts to forgive me. I can't promise when the next chapter will be up, it may be some weeks time becuase I have exams soon but I will make an effort to update asap. I am also aware that chapters have been VERY short lately so hopefully the next one will be longer. can't make promises tho. Enjoy :)

**Chapter 18**

_Severus_ –

The next morning passed by like a dream. Students. Classes. Essays. They were all a blur. Even if forced with Veritaserum, I could not tell what happened that day. The only part that existed for me was when Hermione walked through the door for Potions class after lunch.

We were very careful.

I watched the glum, insipid faces pass by me as I held the door open before class. Somehow, I knew that Hermione would be the last one in the line. I told myself to remain calm and focused. _Albus is already highly suspicious, _I thought. _The last thing you want is to arouse more. _

As I expected, she politely ignored me as she walked into the classroom and made her way over to her seat. I impolitely frowned in my usual manner, and slammed the door closed in the same way I had been doing for years.

'That's enough, now.' My voice was sufficiently sarcastic and the room fell silent. My eyes swept across the students. Draco was fixing his hair in the reflection of his cauldron. Weasley was whispering some inane joke to Dean Thomas. Everyone was looking as bored as usual. It was almost strange to find that not one of them save Hermione knew anything that had happened these last few days. I wondered if she felt how surreal the situation was.

Avoiding her gaze, I waved my wand at the blackboard. 'You will continue the last steps of the Wolfsbane Potion. You will take extra care with steps fourteen and twenty two. You will keep your mouth shut when I am talking, Mr. Weasley,' I added automatically. 'Ten points from Gryffindor.'

The class broke out in whispers as the lighting of cauldrons and setting up of ingredients started. Stalking the room in my usual predatory ways, I headed over to the Slytherins who I could count on to distract me from Hermione's presence. It was a plan I had decided on last night after Albus' encounter. I couldn't trust my own reactions around her. Thankfully, Draco started a conversation with me almost immediately and I listened as intently as possible whilst he drabbled on about applying for Ministry positions after this year.

I was about to assure him that I would gladly offer a reference if he so wished to work at the Ministry when I felt that uncomfortable sense that someone was staring at me. Instinctively I knew who it would be and turned around to meet her gaze before I knew what I was doing.

Hermione was staring at me, but she wasn't making it obvious. She was sitting at her desk while her cauldron simmered. Her head was tilted in her hands and it looked for all the world as if she was merely daydreaming. Her beautiful brown eyes were set on mine but she didn't smile.

Mumbling something to Draco, I drifted casually between desks, sometimes peering into this or that cauldron and smirking at the pathetic attempts students had made. After what seemed forever, I made it to the table that Hermione shared with Potter and Weasley. Potter was closest to me and I bent over his cauldron first. His simmering potion was steel grey in colour. I gave him a smirk and moved on to Weasley, whose potion was giving off the smell of bad meat. I grimaced and tried not to sigh in relief as I ducked down to look at Hermione's cauldron.

As usual, her potion was perfect; exactly the right shade of pale silver that indicated it was complete. Hiding my face from view, I gave her a wink and a quick smile but she sat frowning softly.

'What's wrong?' I murmured. I peered at her face. She looked worried.

'Something feels wrong,' she breathed back. 'I've got a bad feeling about tonight.'

I shook my head almost imperceptibly, even though I had been feeling the same vibes since my argument with Albus. Hermione was worried enough, there was no need to make her more upset.

'Everything will be fine,' I whispered, but somehow I didn't believe what I was saying.

I straightened up and peered down at her potion grumpily. 'Hmmph!' I said loudly enough for Potter to hear, and turned my back on Hermione.

Walking slowly back to the front of the classroom, I glared at the rest of the class. 'Time is up. Siphon your potions into vials and leave them on my desk.' I sat down behind the desk and watched as students sighed and packed their ingredients away.

Ten minutes later, I smirked as heartily as I could manage as vial after vial of useless potion was clunked on the wood desk. As Hermione passed with Potter and Weasley, I called out: 'Remember that you have detention scheduled for eight thirty in my office tonight Miss Granger.' Potter narrowed his eyes but I barely noticed.

'Yes, Professor,' Hermione replied meekly, but I could tell her heart wasn't really in it. She was still as worried as I was about tonight.

As the classroom door shut behind the last of the students, I put my head in my hands and sighed. Why was I worried? Why was Hermione worried? Did she know something I didn't? Was Albus going to interfere?

There were too many questions that I simply didn't have answers for. Groaning, I put my head on the desk and started thumping it out of sheer frustration.

**Yes, I know it's short but fillers are needed to fill in gaps. Please Review and I will love you forever :)**


	19. Chapter 19

_**A**_**/N: **Hello again! Well, what do you know - I said i wouldn't be updating for a week and here I am updating anyway! I guess this is to make up for those weeks where I didn't. Anyhow I know this is short but i think chapters will just have to be shorter now. Thanks heaps to my reviewers, I love you all lots. I'm nearly at the 100th review so please keep those reviews coming!

P.S. This chapter may seem a little confusing at first becuase it's coming out of nowhere but you'll see exactly what's going on with Hermione next chapter. I PROMISE its gonna be a good one!

**Chapter 19**

_Hermione – _

I had a plan.

It wasn't a good plan. In fact, it was terrible. If anyone found out, I'd be expelled for sure. But the fact was that if anyone found out that I was having a relationship with my Potions teacher I was probably going to get me expelled anyway. It would also leave Severus without a job. The only chance either of us had was set within this plan.

I'd decided on the plan after Potions. Severus had tried to reassure me, but it hadn't worked. The expression of almost complete hopelessness was too hard to miss and I'd felt my heart sink. He knew something, I thought as I sprinted up a flight of stairs. Severus knew something that could ruin our lives. Was it about the argument he'd apparently had with Professor Dumbledore? I didn't know, and hadn't had an opportunity yet to ask him.

I considered the plan again.

I was pretty sure it wouldn't work. There were so many things that could go wrong that it seemed more like a suicide mission. But after seeing the look of worry on Severus' face during Potions I had no choice but to go through with it.

I sighed and hurried up a corridor. I'd left Harry and Ron in the library after lunch where they were attempting to finish more homework. I didn't want them caught up in this mess.

I reached my destination: the top of the Astronomy Tower. Peering around anxiously, I looked for _him_. I saw nothing. Where was he? Neville had sworn that I could find him up here. It was supposed to be his favourite haunt.

Then I spotted him. The Bloody Baron's transparent body was slightly hazy in the afternoon sunlight as he drifted aimlessly near the battlements.

Hesitating for only a moment, I hurried towards him. Thankfully, he didn't drift off, but only watched me silently as I wondered how to begin. 'Umm, hello.' I winced at my own lameness but pressed on. 'My name's Hermione Granger. I need to ask you a favour. No, wait!' I cried as he turned dreamily and began to glide away. _Damn_. I knew I only had one card left to play. If this didn't work, nothing would.

'You don't understand!' I almost shouted after him. 'It's about _Peeves_!'

It worked. Everyone knew that the Bloody Baron was the only person who terrified Peeves, a fact that the Baron was known to display to keep Peeves in his place, if not for actual enjoyment.

The Bloody Baron halted and turned around slowly. His bloodstains glittered in the sunlight and I took a hasty step forward. 'I've heard that Peeves has been planning some major havoc down on the third floor and I think it's going to happen tonight,' I said quietly. The Baron stared with gormless eyes and I continued. 'The favour I'm asking is that you don't interrupt Peeves tonight no matter how bad he gets.'

I didn't waste time trying to explain why this was important to me, but got straight down to the point. Besides, I was pretty certain the Baron wouldn't care one way or the other about some measly mortal's problems. The only thing the Baron seemed to care about was terrifying Peeves, and I used it to my advantage.

'Dumbledore's already on the verge of expelling Peeves,' I pressed. 'He's caused far too much damage over the years. If Peeves gets caught by the staff making the amount of mischief he's planning, then I think Dumbledore might actually go through with it. You wouldn't ever have to worry about Peeves again!'

I chewed my lip and waited as the Baron silently thought this over. Finally, to my intense relief and almost unbelieving shock, he nodded in agreement.

'Thank you!' I gasped.

The ghost held up a semi-transparent finger. I nodded. 'That's fine. I understand – just for tonight.'

The Baron shook his chains softly, his face unreadable although I wasn't trying too hard to stare. I watched in silence as he turned and drifted away, but my mind was racing.

I was in luck: the Baron had agreed. So far my plan was working. I checked my watch – there wasn't much time left. I needed to be back in the library in under an hour to avoid raising suspicion from Harry and Ron, not to mention that Ancient Runes essay I hadn't finished!

Turning around, I raced back down the stairs of the Astronomy Tower. The second part of my plan would be easy. Now I just had to hope that the whole performance I was creating would work. My heart raced as I practically flew down the steps. I was Head Girl! If someone had told me I would be doing this a year ago I would have laughed in their face, or at least told a teacher on them. I could barely believe what I was doing and didn't even want to think what would happen if I got caught.

A rebellious urge suddenly overtook my thoughts. Did it matter if I got caught? I was in enough trouble as it was, how much could a little more hurt? I grinned. Oh well, I thought, even if the plan completely fails at least I'll get my revenge on Mrs Norris.

I started laughing to myself then, and couldn't seem to stop. Students passing me on the way to their classes looked back at me like I was insane. Maybe I was, but right then I didn't care. By the time I reached the sixth floor I was cackling like the mad witch I was.

**Give up 25 seconds of your time and please post a review!**


	20. Chapter 20

**_Author Note: Hello! Yes I am still alive and writing. I finally know where this story is going and will be finishing it off. Please enjoy!_**

_Severus – _

I stabbed viscously at a roast potato with my fork and peered around the Great Hall angrily. It was dinner time, and the students were laughing and talking as usual down the four tables. I swept my eyes over my Slytherins to check that everything was in order and scraped my knife irritably around my plate as I attacked my steak.

To my extreme gratefulness, my fellow colleagues took no notice of my performance as they discussed the day's events over my head. My occasional outbursts of frustration on my food had become so commonplace that nobody suspected that tonight's routine was a charade.

In all truthfulness, I wasn't even hungry. I chanced a glance over at Hermione. She was staring at her plate like she never wanted to see food again and subconsciously tapping her fork against the table. For reasons I couldn't fathom, she would turn to look towards the doors that led to the Entrance Hall every once in a while. Well, at least I knew I wasn't the only nervous one.

After my outburst at Albus and my somewhat eclectic performance in Potions I was starting to panic. Not only was I worried that Albus suspected me of something, but I was beginning to think I wouldn't be able to keep up the pretence for much longer. Whenever Hermione was around I couldn't seem to keep my eyes off her, and I could tell she was trying hard not to do the same.

Now I pretended to be glaring at Potter, as I watched her turn to look towards the doors again. What on earth was she doing? Was she waiting for something?

I realised I had been staring for too long. Glancing hastily along the head table I breathed a sigh of relief that no one had appeared to notice. Yes, I really was losing control of myself.

Looking down at my plate I tried to concentrate on my steak and resigned myself to fate. There were no tricks up my sleeves tonight. I would have to simply trust that everything would work out.

Leaving the Great Hall after dinner had turned out to be no mean feat. With Albus watching me out of the corner of his eye there was no way I could leave in a hurry; as much as I wanted to. Instead I swept down to the Slytherins and worked my way along the table, hurrying them off to the Common Room as a good professor should. Calmly, I stopped and chatted to a few of my star pupils about giving extra help if they needed it, and terrified a few first years in the adjoining Hufflepuff table. All in all, I appeared as normal as I had ever been, but I dared not sneak another look at Hermione. I simply could not risk it.

Having fulfilled my teaching duties I hurried out of the Hall and into the dungeons. It would be, I considered, the most appropriate place to be. I did not want to chance Albus finding me elsewhere and I was sure he would check on me before Hermione's scheduled detention.

As I sat down behind my desk in my office I checked the time: seven o'clock. I groaned. Would this meeting never come? The day had passed by so slowly and I simply ached to see Hermione again.

I peered at the towering pile of unmarked essays that forever lined my desk and groaned again. There was no way I could face those papers now. I reached into my desk drawer and pulled out a book instead. It would keep my mind off the coming events for a while. Sighing wearily, I opened the book and tried to relax.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

My head jolted up from my book and I immediately looked at the clock – it was eight forty. I stared back at the door in surprise. How could the time have gone by so quickly? I must have been completely emersed in my book…

BANG! BANG!

The thundering sound came again from behind the closed door. I was instantly suspicious. I couldn't imagine Hermione knocking on the door like that, nor Albus…what on earth?

I yanked open the door and my jaw nearly hit the ground in surprise. It _was_ Hermione! There she stood in the dark dungeon corridor, her hair coming loose and her face flustered. She looked simultaneously anxious, excited and angry…and she was jumping up and down on the spot.

I grabbed her shoulders and steered her gently into the room. A cold draft from the corridor brushed my arm as I closed the door firmly behind me.

'What in Merlin's name was that about?' I frowned at her.

'I could. Ask you. The same. Question.' Her words were coming out in huffs and puffs. She was still jumping up and down.

'What are you talking about?' I tried to get her to sit down but she wouldn't stop jumping.

'I've. Been knocking. On that door. For ten. Bloody. Minutes.'

'Well why didn't you just come in? And will you stop jumping!' I grabbed her arms and held her still. She glared at me.

'I would have come in but the door was locked! So I've been banging on it for ages. What on earth were you doing that you couldn't hear me?' She broke free from my grasp and started to jump again.

'I was reading, Hermione. You of all people should understand how one can get so emersed in a book.' I grinned at her and still jumping, she pouted like a child before breaking into a laugh.

'Alright, then. I suppose. I'll. Forgive you. Just this. Once.' I smiled but shook my head.

'Hermione, would you _please_ stop jumping! What is going on? Do you realise we have limited time?'

She frowned at me, her hair flying around her face. 'I can't stop! It's too cold. I have to. Keep my. Body. Temperature. Up.'

I raised an eyebrow at her. With a flick of my wand the lock on the door clicked back into place. 'Is that so?'

She glared at me crossly between jumps. 'I've been. Standing in. That corridor. For ten. Minutes. Do you. Have any. Idea how. Cold. It gets. Out there?'

I smirked and flicked my wand again. The room's temperature increased to a toasty warmth. 'I suppose it would be, wouldn't it?' I murmured, as I wrapped a hand around her waist and pulled her close.

Hermione had stopped jumping and was trying to catch her breath. My whispers were having some effect on her. 'Hmm-mmm,' she breathed, as she pulled herself even closer to me. I felt her arms encircle my neck and I leant down to kiss her.

Her lips were cold but they melted under mine like butter and I savoured the feel of our bodies being so tightly pressed together as we lightly explored each other's taste and touch. When I broke apart she seemed disappointed.

'What's wrong?' she asked me.

I hesitated, not wanting to alarm her. But as I stared at her, I realised that she held my gaze steadily. Hermione was a lot stronger than I gave her credit. I decided to be completely honest. 'I'm worried that Albus is going to try something tonight. He suspects me. There's a good chance he'll try to catch us together.'

To my complete surprise, Hermione just smiled and gave me a peck on the lips.

'I don't think so,' she said. 'In fact, I'm willing to bet Professor Dumbledore will be a little bit too busy to worry about us.' She grinned and leaned forward for another kiss but I stopped her.

'What?' I was utterly confused. 'Hermione, tell me what you've done!'

My bewilderment only seemed to enhance her delight. She laughed and reached up to tuck a stray hair away from my face. I grabbed her hand and kissed it softly. Her laugh faltered and her staring grew intense. I wanted to run my hands all over her body but I restrained myself. 'Hermione…'

Hermione continued to stare at me. One minute she was laughing, the next she was completely serious.

'I've created a distraction. Up on the third floor. Peeves will be causing some major havoc.'

I frowned. 'That's hardly a distraction. Peeves is always causing some sort of mischief.'

'Not this time,' Hermione stressed. 'I persuaded him to destroy Filch's office, wreck the third floor corridor and attack Mrs Norris.'

'Attack? Hermione, do you think that–?' I started.

'Oh, well probably not attack her. At least, nothing unusually violent. He'll probably just pour ink on her,' Hermione smirked.

I gawped at her like a mindless idiot. 'And that will–?'

'Distract Dumbledore long enough for us to be together, yes,' Hermione finished. She broke out into another laugh and kissed me again. 'Don't look so shocked,' she said.

'I can't help it,' I replied. 'This was not the sort of thing Hermione Granger would do.'

She stopped nibbling at my lips and gave me a deep frown. 'No, you're right,' she said. 'It isn't the sort of thing I do.' Suddenly she straightened up and stared at me coolly. I raised an eyebrow. 'What exactly do you want from me?' she asked, seriously. 'I mean, here I am – Head Girl, a student of Hogwarts – kissing my Professor in his office. That's not exactly appropriate. Forget that I'm of age. If this gets out, we are both finished. My education. Your career. Done. Completely over with.' Saying it aloud seemed to shake her. She lowered herself into a chair opposite the desk.

My insides went cold. Did she want to leave? 'That is true. Maybe it would be best if we stopped.'

The starkness of my words made her look up at me, shocked. 'Is that it then? Is that what this is, because if it is then just say so. I need to know where I stand.'

I moved over and grasped her shoulders gently, looking down at her. 'Hermione, this isn't a game for me, and given my current relationship with most students I can hardly tell you that this is something I've ever done before.' I gave a mirthless laugh and pulled her out of the chair. 'I want you to trust me,' I said, looking into her eyes. 'I want you to know that I will be here for you.'

She smiled then, and I felt my inner heat return. But when she stroked my face she looked sad. 'You can hardly be here for me if we get caught, you know.' She sighed. 'I just don't know, Severus. How is this going to work?'

I couldn't give her an answer because I'd been thinking the exact same question over and over in my mind and there didn't seem to be a logical response. The only way was to wait until the end of the year when she finally graduated. However, the idea of waiting that long to be anywhere alone with Hermione was not something I found appealing. When I told her my thoughts she gave me a frown that plainly said she was feeling the same way.

'That's months away, Severus.' I sighed because I knew it too.

'I know. But what other choice do we have? We can't hide out here, trying to come up with plans to stop Albus finding us. He already suspects me of something. Another meeting like this and he'll find us, no doubt.'

Before she had time to answer, I saw something silvery-grey in the corner of my eye and turned instinctively, wand at the ready. My first thought was of Dumbledore – he had found us. It took me a split-second to realise that I was wrong. It was a ghost.

It was, in fact, the Fat Friar; who had wafted through the door and was standing a few feet away looking slightly flushed. Thankfully, Hermione had already moved away from me and was sitting back down at her chair opposite my desk. The Friar gave a cough, which I thought was a tad too ironic for my liking. 'Sorry to intrude Professor, but I've been sent down to let you know about Peeves' mischief.'

I feigned innocence. 'Peeves? What's he done this time?'

'He's completely wrecked the third floor. Filch has gone absolutely mad – apparently Mrs Norris was chased by a set of cursed encyclopaedias and then tossed onto a chandelier. The ghosts have been searching high and low for the Baron but we can't seem to find him.'

'Where is Professor Dumbledore?' I asked sharply.

The Friar wrung his semi-transparent hands together in anguish. 'No one seems to know! Professor McGonagall sent me to ask you if you knew.'

I shook my head. 'I am sure Minerva has found him, Friar. I suggest you go back and keep trying to find the Baron. Check the battlements again. He may be floating around there now. I will be up shortly to assist Filch.' I gave him a cold stare until he had floated away through the wall which he had entered.

Hermione gave me a look of relief and slumped back in her chair. 'Thank Merlin for that!'

I gave a wry grin and strode over to her. 'My dear, you have no faith in me.'

She laughed as I pulled her out of the chair and gave her a quick but passionate kiss. 'You? Shouldn't you be thanking me? I'm the one who set Peeves up!' She laughed again and playfully pulled a lock of my hair. 'But you're right. I really should give you more credit for your acting ability, shouldn't I?'

I caught her hand in mine as she rain it through my hair, and held it. 'You know, perhaps we could do this,' I pondered.

Hermione raised her eyebrows. 'Do what? Play out the rest of this year?' She paused to think about it, but then shook her head. 'Severus….how? It will be impossible.'

Hermione's doubt seemed to spur my brain into motion. 'No, it won't. Think about it, Hermione. We really don't have long to go. You finish up in just over six months, not to mention there will be holiday periods where no one will be necessarily checking things…we could do it. There are a number of things we could use as excuses to meet – study groups, exam preparation.' For a moment I paused, soaking up the happy thoughts of spending more time with Hermione. 'After you graduate, nothing would have to be a secret.' I looked down at her to find her smiling. 'We would need to be very careful though,' I added in seriousness. 'No more mistakes with Mrs Norris. And Dumbledore is watching me very closely now. One wrong step and it's curtains for both of us.'

'Quite right, Severus,' said a voice. But it was not Hermione's. We turned in unison towards the dungeon door. Although still firmly bolted shut, we gazed at the door with open mouths in horror to see Dumbledore standing there; his eyes a cold blaze of fury and his wand pointed at my heart.


End file.
